


Love Like Faete

by chatielee, crackpairingprincess



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fae, Fae!Tsukishima, Falling In Love, Human!Kageyama, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, M/M, Making Out, Oikawa Tooru Being Oikawa Tooru, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Side Story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:40:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 29,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24437575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chatielee/pseuds/chatielee, https://archiveofourown.org/users/crackpairingprincess/pseuds/crackpairingprincess
Summary: Kageyama never asked to get trapped in the Faerie realm. He never asked to get stuck with a body guard that's snarky and stubborn and way too good looking.Kageyama never asked to fall in love with Tsukishima Kei.
Relationships: Kageyama Tobio/Tsukishima Kei
Comments: 5
Kudos: 200





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Set immediately after the events of [chapter 11](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16736127/chapters/41199527#workskin) of [ A Twist of Faete](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16736127/chapters/39258090).
> 
> If you're reading this as a stand alone fic, or if you just want a quick refresher, [HERE](https://crackpairingprincess.tumblr.com/post/619440647611547648/what-you-need-to-know-the-tsukikage-fae-au) is what you need to know.
> 
> Special shoutout to [ Pastelinings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastelinings/pseuds/pastelinings) for commenting and consequentially making me realize that I never posted this. It's been like 2 years I am so so sorry.

_ "Fate shows a different face, the gulf between what we are and what we think we are." - Stelios Ramphos, Fate and Ambiguity in Oedipus the King _

_ \---------------- _

Kageyama collapses on the couch as soon as they arrive back from their long trip to Kuroo's. The house is warm enough to make his frozen cheeks tingle as he slowly warms back up. 

The door closes somewhere behind him, but he doesn't move an inch. He fully expects Tsukishima to come prod him, to tell him to take his jacket off at least. But the guard doesn't even come through the room. That's odd. It's been months since they stopped avoiding each other.

"Tsukishima!" Kageyama calls out to no answer. 

He doesn't push the issue, knowing he'll just end up being yelled at and annoyed. He does eventually take off his jacket but stays lounged on the couch waiting for Tsukishima to come back.

He doesn't really know why he's waiting. Something is just off and he doesn't like whatever it is.    
  
Normally, Tsukishima makes them both a warm cup of herbal tea and they share a few moments in companionable silence before going their separate ways for bed. And, sure, maybe Tsukishima is tired from their long day. But that doesn't mean Kageyama can't be sulky about it.

The longer he waits the more he feels like an idiot. But it's only when he almost falls asleep on the couch he realizes that Tsukishima isn't coming. And he knows that if he falls asleep here Tsukishima will give him an earful in the morning.   
  
Kageyama huffs and gets up, jacket in hand. He walks through the dark house and even notices how there is light coming from underneath Tsukishima's door. Kageyama rolls his eyes and continues to his room, too tired to care anymore.

Whatever Tsukishima had stuck up his ass would be gone by tomorrow. He decides to just go to bed and tries not to think about whether or not Tsukishima would be around for breakfast in the morning.

He wakes up the next morning to the smell of spiced meats, making his stomach growl. Realizing now that in all of the traveling he didn't eat any dinner, Kageyama rolls himself out of bed solely for the promise of food and not any company that could be attached to it. 

He doesn't know why Tsukishima's absence is bothering him so much but if he's still making them breakfast not everything can be bad.

He wanders downstairs still in his boxers from home, just because he's gotten into the habit of not getting dressed before he has to in the mornings. Tsukishima's blond hair is sticking up in all directions, glasses not yet on. He's just pouring fresh tea into two cups as if he knew Kageyama would be heading down.

"Morning." 

Kageyama sits down in front of one of the plates filled with food: sausage eggs, toast on the side. The tea smells amazing as normal but he doesn't feel like talking. It's too early to try the 'manners' his brother has been trying make him practice. And it's not like Tsukishima has any himself.

He gets a grunt in response, which is not unusual seeing as Tsukishima was barely a person before 10am. He wonders how late his guard stayed up last night, if he even noticed Kageyama went to bed on his own.   
  
Not that he cares if Tsukishima noticed. He doesn't need him to babysit or something.

Tsukishima claims the other plate quickly after the tea is served. He barely looks in Kageyama's direction as he starts shoveling food in his mouth. Which is fine because Kageyama doesn't want to talk anyway.

The food is amazing as usual. Kageyama isn't sure if it's the fae food itself or if it's Tsukishima's cooking skills, but he doesn't exactly care either.    
  
The royal chef, Yamaguchi, had attempted to teach Kageyama how to cook for himself, but that had only lasted a few horrendous weeks before Tsukishima got sick of cleaning up the war zone of a kitchen and said he would just cook everything himself.    
  
Which works just fine for Kageyama. He hates cooking anyway.    
  
Since then, they've fallen into a nice give-and-take system. Kageyama grows the herbs and vegetables they need and Tsukishima prepares their meals. Kageyama cleans up around the house (which Tsukishima is surprisingly awful at), and Tsukishima does most of their errands and household repairs.

It's a sort of dynamic he's never experienced before. At home, his mom did everything and his father just took her for granted. It's unexpectedly nice to feel independent. He never would have been able to have this opportunity if he stayed with his parents. He doesn't even want to know how things would have turned out if he stayed with them.   
  
He's sure Tsukishima still thinks of him as a spoiled brat but he can't depend on his brother as much since he's busy with Ushijima in the castle. He's trying to earn his keep and he thinks he's doing a pretty good job. Especially since he and Tsukishima aren't at each other's throats like they used to be.

Now that winter is in full swing, he feels a little less helpful on the kitchen front, but Tsukishima doesn't mention it at all. Kageyama spends most of these snowy, frozen days inside pouting about the weather until Tsukishima drags him out to go shopping or to visit the blond's family.

He thinks that might be the only problem that's come out of this situation. He's become dependent on Tsukishima in some ways, especially socially. He hasn't made many friends, granted he didn't have many at home either but at least there he had his teammates.   
  
He doesn't really want to leave today, still recovering from the cold trip yesterday. He wishes they had movies here so he could just laze on the couch and marathon, letting winter take its hold.

He doesn't realize how much time has passed until Tsukishima stands up and takes his plate to the sink without a word. Kageyama looks up at him and watches the guard's shoulders flex under his dark gray shirt. 

Something was off with Tsukishima. He just didn't know what.

And he can't just ask. They've never been a pair that talks or shares. He doesn't know if he should bring it up because he still hasn't fully figured Tsukishima out. There's a 50/50 chance Tsukishima is going to end up yelling at him. 100% chance of being snarky in general. So he tries the safest option.   
  
"What are you doing today?"

"It's a blizzard outside." Tsukishima mutters. There's the snarky tone Kageyama was waiting for. "I thought I would take a nice stroll."

Kageyama rolls his eyes. "Maybe you should."

That pulls a smirk to Tsukishima's lips. In the time that they've lived together Kageyama has learned Tsukishima's brand of humor.    
  
"Why, did you want to do something today?"

Kageyama shrugs. This is the first time he's actually been trapped inside of the house rather than just be annoyed by the snow.   
  
"What do you normally do on days when you can't leave the house?"

"Read, sometimes exercise indoors." Tsukishima finally turns around to look at him oddly. "I was thinking I would relax from having to deal with Kuroo and your brother yesterday."

Reading sounds boring but working out could be a good option. Most of his physical activity has been gardening since he's come here so it's probably a good thing to do something else. But Tsukishima's second answer bothers him a bit. 

"You need a day to recover from my brother?"

Tsukishima is quiet for a minute. "I should go change."

That's not an answer but he really shouldn't expect one from Tsukishima anyway. 

"Whatever."

Really, it's nothing too much different from their normal interactions. But something about it still sets Kageyama on edge. He glares at Tsukishima's back as he walks into the hallway, waiting until he can't see him anymore to get up and curse under his breath.    
  
It's stupid to push Tsukishima. It's stupid to let this bother him. But no one has ever accused Kageyama of being the smart one, and before he can really think about it he's following Tsukishima up the stairs in a huff.   
  
"So you're just going to ignore my question?"    
  
Tsukishima sighs like he knew Kageyama wasn't going to just let it drop. He turns his back as he gets to his wardrobe and sheds his nightshirt.    
  
"Your brother is too nosy for his own good."

Kageyama frowns as confusion takes over his expression. Sure his brother likes to talk a lot but he knows when to stop. If anything from yesterday, it was him who was being nosy. Asking Sawamura too many questions.   
  
"How was he being nosy? I was the one you were yelling at yesterday."

Tsukishima tosses a look over his bare shoulder and mutters in fae.    
  
"At least he hasn't told you."

"What-" Kageyama is about to ask what but luckily he remembers quickly enough that Tsukishima doesn't know he can understand him. So for once he does the smart thing and plays dumb. "What did you say? You know I don't like it when you do that."

"You don't like it when I do a lot of things, Tobio."

Kageyama crosses his arms. He gets called his first name by almost everyone here but it feels weird when Tsukishima does it. Different. Special, in a way. Even if he finds himself calling him by his given name too.   
  
"Like how you're not answering any of my questions?"

"Yeah." Tsukishima pulls on a fresh shirt, black this time. "Like that."

Kageyama audibly huffs but doesn't say anymore. He's been trying really hard to work on his temper and outbursts, especially with Tsukishima since they're living together. But it's hard when Tsukishima is always pushing his buttons.   
  
Tsukishima pushes down his pajama pants and looks over his shoulder at Kageyama. 

"How long are you going to watch me undress?"

"You're the one undressing in front of me, pervert." 

Kageyama can feel his cheeks color. He wasn't aware that he had really been staring. Not to mention that he's still only in his boxers and a t-shirt. For reasons unknown to even himself, Kageyama still doesn't leave.

Tsukishima half turns and raises his eyebrows at him, clearly not impressed with his response. 

"I said I was changing and then you followed me up here."

"And you still haven't answered my question!" Kageyama has reached his limit of how much he can hold his tongue. His temper flares like an oil fire.

"Why does it matter?" Tsukishima evenly says back, still not fully facing him. "Your brother talks too much and it's annoying. There."

"You never said anything about him before." It's partly a question, partly an accusation. Kageyama takes a step closer even though Tsukishima is no longer looking at him. "Did he say something to you yesterday?"

"No." The answer is quick but it doesn't seem honest. "I just don't like being around him for so long."

Kageyama knows faeries cannot lie outright, but being around Tsukishima for so long has taught him that that does not mean they cannot lie by omission.    
  
"You're being weird." He says, because he doesn't know how else to say what he's thinking.

"And now you're being nosy." Tsukishima growls and filters through his dresser searching for a pair of pants. It sounds like he's starting to lose his temper too.

If Kageyama's temper is fire, then Tsukishima's is poison; slowly seeping out and disintegrating everything in its path. It's toxic, and somehow addicting. Kageyama never wants to stop when he sees that look in Tsukishima's eyes.   
  
"I think I deserve to know about my...my guard."

Tsukishima sighs and with a pair of pants in hand he turns to look directly at Kageyama. 

"It's my job to know you, to protect you. You don't need to know me."

The words are not harsh or scathing, so why did they strike Kageyama in the chest like a physical blow? His heart hurts and the sinking feeling pulls all of the anger away with it.    
  
"But what if I want to?"

Tsukishima pauses with one pant leg on, just for a moment, before slowly finishing getting dressed. He takes his time to finish before he faces Kageyama and leans against the dresser. He crosses his arms but he doesn't look angry, more curious.   
  
"Why would you want to know about me?"

"We live together." Even as Kageyama says it, it feels like an excuse. "Why can't I know about the person I share every day with?"

"You already know enough." Tsukishima answers back and walks out of the room, leaving Kageyama dumbfounded. Soon after he hears another door closing and he assumes it's the bathroom.

Kageyama feels stupid now. He wasn't sure what he thought was going to happen, but he didn't think Tsukishima was going to walk away. That's simply unlike him. And now Kageyama is alone, in his bedclothes, in his guard's room feeling like he just got shot down somehow.

The worst thing is that they can't be apart. They are effectively trapped in the house together, even if it's big they're never that far apart. And there's nothing he can think of to distract him from the heaviness in his chest. 

Without much thought he goes back to his room, slamming the door loud enough for Tsukishima to hear from down the hall.

Tooru isn't the only one in the family that's dramatic. Must be in their genes or something.    
  
Kageyama flops down on his bed. He doesn't want to change, or work out, or do anything but sulk for a while. But eventually the chill of the house seeps into his bones and pushes him to actually put on clothes.    
  
He chooses some of the fae style clothing he's been provided. They are all soft, sleek garments that he almost feels too fancy wearing, but they're warmer than the jeans and sweatshirt he has from his own realm.

He still doesn't leave the room. Now he just feels awkward and, worse, he doesn't know where Tsukishima is in the house. He doesn't want to walk in on him and have the silence be oppressive rather than comforting.

It's the absolute worst day for it. Stuck in this place with nothing to do. He huffs and makes the decision to crack open the door. 

Tsukishima isn't in the hall, and he can't hear him anywhere. He feels like a child again, sneaking around at night so his parents wouldn't catch him trying to go play volleyball outside. He's glad the wooden floors don't creak like one would expect, and he slips out the hall and down the stairs to the great room, where Tsukishima had apparently already lit the fireplace.

Tsukishima isn't in the room when he peeks his head in. And it doesn't sound like he's in the kitchen. He goes inside and takes a few pillows and throws them on the floor in front of the fireplace. He never was able to experience one in his apartment so regardless of how upset he's feeling, he's determined to enjoy it. He lies on the pillows with a blanket and curls up to keep warm.

The dry heat makes him close his eyes and before he knows it he's waking up to Tsukishima kneeling over him, poking him in the face.

His hand is cold when Kageyama bats it away on reflex.   
  
"Why are you on the floor?"

Kageyama groans and rolls over so he can't see Tsukishima. For extra measure, he pulls the blanket closer to his face. "It's warmer here."

Tsukishima sighs and then there's a shift next to him and Kageyama realizes that the guard is sitting down too. His heart pounds, wondering what it will lead to. Uncomfortable silence? Tsukishima bitching at him? But Tsukishima doesn't say anything except, "It is pretty warm."

Kageyama bites his lip. He can't tell if this is Tsukishima's way to apologize but he takes the chance that it is. He turns back over to see Tsukishima settling to lie on his side, propped up by his elbow. He's too close. Too far. Some weird not enough in between. 

"Have you slept in front of a fire like this before?" Tobio asks.

"Not since I was a child." His tone is different than before. Less venom and more caution. "Have you?"

"No. We didn't have a fireplace in our apartment." 

It's always been something he's seen on TV. To him it's always symbolized a happy home and family. He never really had either no matter how hard his mom tried. His father always ruined everything.

It must make him frown because Tsukishima kicks him lightly.   
  
"I can hear you being bitter from here. Whatever you're thinking about, knock it off."

"Shut up." It's half-hearted but that's about all he can manage right now. "I'm allowed to be bitter when I'm thinking about my dad."

"Don't think about him, then." Kageyama is about to snap back and tell the blond not to tell him what to do, but Tsukishima continues, "He's not worth your emotional energy."

Kageyama pauses. Tsukishima's attitude has completely changed from this morning. This probably is his way of apologizing. 

"I wish I had parents like yours. They're always so nice to me. Plus they actually wanted their kids."   
  
Ever since Tooru told him about his father, about how he sold Tooru's life away for fortune, about how he was arrogant enough to try and fool a fae, he's been accepting his true nature more and more. He's not really mad anymore, it's more like indifference. Since he will rarely go back to the human world, he doesn't have to worry about seeing him again.

He's even a bit resentful of his mother. She could have stopped his father, she could have gotten them out of the emotional abuse before it got this bad. He knows it's probably unfair, but he needs to blame someone. At least for right now.    
  
"That doesn't make them perfect. At least you're away from your parents."

"I know. It's even better that  _ he's _ away from my mom." 

The days after Tooru was taken were scarier than any time his father lost his temper before. Himari loved Tooru like he was her son and it broke her heart but worse was that it made her angry. She kept challenging his father, little comments pointing out his faults and what an awful person he was, the awful things he did. Tobio was proud of her for that but also terrified. Even when his father started hitting her, she persisted. And everything kept snowballing from there.   
  
Kageyama feels sadness settle over him. Even if he's comfortable here and is bitter, he still misses his mom. He exposes a hand from under the blanket and tugs on Tsukishima's shirt.   
  
"Can we have dessert for dinner tonight? I don't want to eat normal food."

"Yeah." Tsukishima would never say no to sweets. "Just don't pout all night."

He sends a scowl at the blond, but quickly looks away when he's met with a smirk. 

“Yeah, that face.”

Stupid smug faerie. 

"I'm bored." Kageyama rolls on his back and stares at the ceiling. But his hand is still gripping Tsukishima's shirt. "...Are you okay?"

"I'm okay." Tsukishima pulls Kageyama's hand from his shirt, but doesn't let it go. "Are you?"

"Yeah." This isn't the first time that they've been close like this. But normally Tsukishima doesn't touch him for too long. "This morning was weird."

"Yeah." Tsukishima echoes. There's no explanation, no apology, but it's enough. They're okay again. 

Tsukishima's hand feels warm on his now, the cold melting between their palms, but he doesn't dare link their fingers together. That would mean something, and this simply doesn't.

He almost falls asleep again but shocks when Tsukishima lets go of his hand and stands up. "What dessert do you want? We can make it together."

That sounds like a lot of work, but Tsukishima's voice is so gentle, so smooth, that Kageyama forgets that he's tired. He would probably go outside and scrub the windows in the blizzard if Tsukishima asked him in that voice.

He slowly stands up and walks into the kitchen after Tsukishima. "Do you have brownies? It's like a chocolate cake but fudgier and tastes better."

"Is that kind of what Yamaguchi made a few weeks ago? Those things he cut into squares?"

Kageyama is surprised that he even remembers. It didn't seem like he was paying any attention. "Yeah. Do you know how to make it?

"I watched him do it. I think I can remember." The blond starts pulling ingredients out of their cabinets, reaching over Kageyama's head to grab a burlap sack of flour.

The last time he made brownies from scratch he was a lot younger. He would bake on cold afternoons with his mom. Back then he was barely tall enough to put his elbows on the counter; he would move his stool place to place. His favorite was when his mom let him lick the mixing spoon; to him the batter tasted better than the finished product.   
  
"I get to lick the bowl."

"What are you, a dog?" Tsukishima laughs, but doesn't say no.

"No, stupid. I'll use a spoon." Kageyama retaliates anyway. 

He starts getting out bowls and a whisk. He'll get the tools while Tsukishima actually does the cooking. If he touches it they'll probably turn out awful.

They're back to that companionable silence again, comfortable and easy. Tsukishima hums a little while he puts things together, but Kageyama doesn't comment on it. He knows that the guard would immediately stop if he did.

He likes that Tsukishima is letting his walls down around him. He's treating him like an actual person rather than the job he was before, no matter what he said this morning.

Speaking of this morning, he never did find out what was bothering Tsukishima so much. They both just cooled off and somehow things were better.

He decides to let it go for now. Really, if Tsukishima wasn't going to tell him today there's a pretty high chance that he's never going to. So for now he focuses on Tsukishima's minimal instructions and does his best at making brownies.

Mostly he watches, because he nearly crushed the entire egg trying to crack it and Tsukishima banned him from touching the actual ingredients anymore. But he's still having fun. It's easy to be with Tsukishima like this. He's glad he didn't have to spend the day alone.

As Tsukishima is putting the pan in the oven (it uses real fire to heat it which is another reason why he's banned from cooking), Kageyama sits on the counter with the batter bowl on his lap. He forgoes the spoon he mentioned earlier in favor for his finger as he cleans it out.

"You're getting all messy." Tsukishima comments from where he's leaning on the other side of the counter. "I'm not giving you a bath, dog."

"I don't need you to wash my hands." To be fair, he can feel some chocolate on his chin but he doesn't acknowledge it. He swipes some on his finger and slightly holds it out to Tsukishima. "Do you want some?"

For a moment, Tsukishima looks like he's going to refuse. But the second that Kageyama shrugs and goes to eat it, Tsukishima grabs his hand and pulls it back, taking just the tip of his finger into his mouth.

The motion takes Kageyama by surprise but he let's it happen. He didn't think Tsukishima would actually do it, especially since he's a bit particular about hygiene. His tongue is hot on his finger, a big difference from the batter. He doesn't want to make a big deal about it but he can't help but feel a little embarrassed.   
  
"It's good, right?"

The noise it makes when Tsukishima lets his finger go is positively obscene and Kageyama can only hope his face isn't as red as it feels.    
  
"It turned out better than I thought."

Kageyama blinks, momentarily distracted by the sound before he nods and continues eating. Now the silence between them feels charged but he won't bring it up. Tsukishima probably doesn't feel it and Kageyama himself doesn't even want to.

He doesn't want to feel something he doesn't understand. It was just sharing some food, so why does he feel like his chest might explode?

Tsukishima is tapping his fingers on the counter like he's thinking. He isn't looking at Kageyama and he thinks that's for the best. There's some time until there is the distraction of the brownies, the notion of doing something else. Now Kageyama feels like he's in some sort of limbo and he doesn't know how to break it.

"Hey." Tsukishima finally speaks up again, still not looking at him. "Give me another taste."

Kageyama moves to hold out the bowl, letting Tsukishima do it himself but he doesn't think that's what the blond wants. The bowl is almost empty by now anyway so he scrapes what he can on to his finger and reaches out. 

"Here."

Tsukishima takes his finger like before, but this time he just licks the dollop of batter straight off.    
  
"Does this taste like the brownies you were expecting?"

"Yeah." Kageyama jumps down from the counter and drops the bowl in the sink. He washes his hands almost like he's proving a point to Tsukishima that he's not like a dog. "They're a little different but it still tastes really good."

"It does." Tsukishima agrees. His eyes are tracking Kageyama's form from across the room. It's almost like Kageyama can feel it.

He turns around to catch him in the act but Tsukishima looks calm and normal when they make eye contact. He wants to fill the silence for the first time ever. Tsukishima has this mentality of hating small talk so Kageyama doesn't want to piss him off like he somehow did this morning. So he stays quiet and why he even stays in the room is beyond him.

"I'll check the pan in a few more minutes." Tsukishima says, though it seems more like he just needed something to say. Kageyama wonders if maybe he's not the only one that wants to break the silence.

"Okay." Kageyama bites his lip. Their silence has never felt this weighted even after they've fought. Looking back this morning doesn't even seem like a big deal in comparison. "They're better not completely done."

He's acknowledged with a hum before they're swimming in that silence again. It's a few minutes when Tsukishima speaks again. 

"What's with the face?" Tsukishima still hasn't taken his eyes off of him.

"What? I'm not making a face."

"You are." Tsukishima wraps his hand in a thick glove similar to an oven mitt. The heat of the oven brushes past Kageyama's face as it's opened and the scent it brings with it is amazing. "You're going to make your lips chapped."

"It's fine." Kageyama leans over Tsukishima to look at the treat. "It could use another minute."

Tsukishima listens to him on this one and closes the door. They're standing closer now, but neither of them move.

Kageyama leans against the counter like his chest isn't feeling tighter. Whatever has been going on with Tsukishima today he definitely doesn't want to lose. He doesn't want to be the one who breaks this game of chicken.

The feeling stays even long after the brownies have cooled and they've eaten more than half the pan, chased it with cold milk. They're back in front of the fire as the sky outside turns pitch black.    
  
"You can't be tired again." Tsukishima says as Kageyama flops on his pile of pillows in front of the fire.

"I'm not tired." Kageyama sighs, pulling the blanket around him. "I'm bored. And I'm full of brownies."

"You're bored." Tsukishima repeats. "What do you want to do then?"

"I don't know." Kageyama rolls on his stomach. "Normally on snow days I just watch movies all day but we can't do that here. And you weren't very helpful this morning when I asked."

Tsukishima's eye twitches a little. "Any suggestions?"

"Well, it's too late to go outside and I don't feel like reading." Kageyama braces himself up on his elbows. "What about a game? Like a card game?"

Tsukishima nods slowly, but admits, "I don't know many games humans play."

Kageyama pulls himself up and sits right in front of Tsukishima, finally excited that he thought of something to do. "That's okay, I can reach you. Do you have a normal deck of cards? Like human normal or a fae version could work."

"I believe our cards are similar to yours, just with different names." Tsukishima stands up to go upstairs. "Do you want to play down here?"

The fire is still going warm behind him and he doesn't want to lose that heat. "Yeah. It's more comfortable."

The guard accepts the answer and goes off for the cards, returning only a moment later with a soft velvet sack. He pulls the drawstrings open and pours the cards into his hand, going about shuffling them while he speaks.   
  
"What game are you going to teach me?"

"There's a few we can do with two people." Kageyama sits up and crosses his legs, pulling a blanket around his waist. "Let's play war. That's simple enough."   
  
Tsukishima places the cards in front of Kageyama which he takes to look over the suits. "Basically we split the deck and show the card on top. The one that's higher wins and you take the other card. Whoever gets all the cards wins."

"Easy enough." Tsukishima mutters. "You start."

Kageyama splits the deck and starts the game. It's a little boring at first but when Kageyama continually wins he can see the frustration mounting in Tsukishima, making it competitive. It's nice to finally have the upper hand on Tsukishima even if it's as simple as a card game.

After the fourth time he loses, Tsukishima throws his cards down. "This game is ridiculous! There is no strategy to it, it is all just chance!"

Kageyama laughs and takes his winnings. "Yeah that's the point. Unless you want to play poker these games are just for fun."

"These are not fun, this is ludicrous." Kageyama snorts. Tsukishima is a sore loser after all.

"Okay okay." Kageyama takes the cards and stacks them back up. "Do you want to play any fae games, Mr. Sore Loser?"

"You may know this one." Tsukishima takes the stack and, in a petulant moment, tosses it between them. "Fifty two pick up."

Kageyama glares, his good mood affected a bit. "Don't be mean. I'm not picking those up."

He would be a little more sour about it if Tsukishima's lips didn't twitch up in the barest hint of a smile as he starts picking up the cards.    
  
"Fine. Let's play something else. You wanted to learn a fae game?"

"Yeah." Kageyama scoots closer. "Do you know any? You don't seem like the type of person who played games as a kid." He adds teasingly.

"You have met my family. You know full well that I was forced to have fun with them as a child." Tsukishima laughs too, obviously in a better mood. "I'll teach you Cinnidh. It translates loosely to Fortune, and it's a very popular game for school aged fae."

"So it's a game based on luck?" Kageyama frowns. "Isn't that what you were just yelling at me about?"

"It's a party game, not a win-or-lose game." Tsukishima rolls his eyes like it was obvious. "I think humans have something like it, though I don't know what it's called. Basically, you have to ask a question that starts with why, how, where, or when. The other person flips a card, and the card determines how your story progresses. School children like to ask things like how they can get someone's attention, or where they should go to meet new friends." Tsukishima shuffles the cards without even looking. "Make sense?"

Kageyama's face scrunched in confusion. "How does the card determine the story?"

The blond starts to explain, but quickly thinks better of it. He shifts so that he's sitting directly across from Kageyama.   
  
"I'll explain as we go. Ask a question."

Kageyama sighs and goes along with it. "Okay. Will the snow stop tomorrow?"

Tsukishima clicks his tongue at him. "Try again. It can't be a yes or no question."

Kageyama purses his lips and thinks. "How long will it take for Kuroo-san to find Iwa-chan?"

The first card goes face up and Tsukishima interprets. "Six of hearts. Reunion and reconnection. That's a good one."

"Okay." Kageyama starts, feeling excited about the answer. "Do I ask another one?"

"Yes. Typically you ask three and then switch. All the questions can be related, or they can be completely random."

"When am I going to see my mom again?"

"Three of souls." Tsukishima says as he flips the card. His finger taps the odd symbol that replaces the suit. Kageyama assumes it reads as 'soul' but really he didn't pay attention to Akaashi's writing lessons. "Patience."

Kageyama swallows and takes the information. It's not like he expected an answer that made sense. So this time he goes a little on a limb. It's probably going to backfire but he's never been one for caution. 

"Why were you mad at my brother?"

There's a hesitation to Tsukishima's hand, but he swallows and draws the card.   
  
"Champion of blades. Realization, clarity."

Kageyama blinks. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You had your three questions." Tsukishima quickly shoves the cards back into the deck. "Do you want to try reading them? I think I have a chart for it in the deck box."

"That wasn't a question for the deck." Kageyama ignores the question. He doesn't know why he wants to know his explanation so badly but he feels it's important. "It was a question for you."

"Let it lie, Tobio."

"I can't." Kageyama sighs and scratches the back of his head. "I don't know why but I need to know."

The cards are shuffled, replaced in their pouch. Tsukishima's expression is the same as always, but Kageyama can tell that he's thinking.    
  
Each minute drags on more strained by the second. Kageyama feels his frustration boil up again.   
  
"Well?! Are you going to say something?!" He's trying to communicate what he wants and needs, and Tsukishima is just sitting there like he's not even in the room.    
  
"There's nothing to tell. It doesn't matter in the long run."    
  
Tsukishima stands up and Kageyama is on his feet right after. Before he can stop himself, his hand is shooting out and grabbing Tsukishima's shirt by the collar.

Tsukishima reactively grabs his wrists hard and tugs his grip off his shirt. The hold on his hands hurts, Tsukishima's unnatural strength a stark reminder that he's not human. Not something Kageyama understands. There’s a brief moment where Tsukishima instinctively pulls him closer, but he seems to find resolve and pushes Kageyama away from him towards the door. 

Kageyama stumbles in his footing and almost falls down but catches himself before he hits the doorframe. Tsukishima isn't looking at him, instead he's picking up the blankets they were just using.   
  
"Just go to sleep. I'll clean up in here."

"I don't want to go to sleep!" Kageyama snatches the blanket out of Tsukishima's hands just to get the blond to look at him. "I want you to stop being so damn cryptic and tell me what's going on!"

"Stop being a child!" Tsukishima yells. Kageyama flinches back, not expecting Tsukishima to raise his voice so quickly. Tsukishima sighs and bends down to fold the other blanket. "Tobio. You just don't need to know."

"You can't trust me even this much?" It's an accusation as much as it is a plea. He wishes Tsukishima would at least look at him.

"It's not about trusting you, Tobio." Tsukishima turns to him but his face is guarded. "I would just like to keep things to myself."

"You're such an asshole, you know that?" Kageyama spits. He's run out of things to say.

Tsukishima frowns and turns away back towards the mess on the floor. 

"I know."

That was...anticlimactic? Somehow Kageyama isn't satisfied with that. He pulls on his sleeves, itching to just reach out and shake him.

Tsukishima folds the blanket but when he turns he looks surprised to still see Kageyama there. 

"What? You're not going to run off in a huff? You've caused your scene, you did your yelling. Isn't storming out the next step?"

"Where am I supposed to go?" Kageyama hates the mockery in Tsukishima's voice. "I told you I'm not going to bed."

"Not here." He says it like it's the most natural thing. "There are plenty of rooms in the house. Pick one."

So Tsukishima wants him to leave? Fine. He whirls on his heel and stomps up the stairs. He goes into the room Tsukishima has turned into a miniature gym. Working out his anger seems like a good option.

He throws his sweater on the floor and goes to the opposite corner where Tsukishima has set up a punching bag. It seems fitting to let out his aggression this way. So he finds his gloves and starts punching.

He keeps going until he's panting, until his knuckles are sore under the thick leather covering his fists, and his anger has simmered down to a dull ache in his chest.    
  
This day has been equal parts awful and great. He can admit now that he enjoys Tsukishima's company. When he's not being an absolute bastard, of course. They fight often enough that this shouldn't bother him. But today wasn't just any other fight, another one of their stupid disagreements.

Kageyama throws off his gloves and lays on the floor. If he was thinking clearly he would have changed before hand, his winter outfit wasn't the best option. His clothes are sticking to him making him feel gross but he just tries to get his breathing back to normal.   
  
The worst part about coming down from this anger is that part of him wants Tsukishima to walk through the door. He wants Tsukishima to check on him but he knows that probably won't happen.

If he listens, he can hear Tsukishima in the room across the hall. They use that room as a study of sorts, not that Kageyama goes in there unless he needs a pen or something.    
  
In his head, he goes through scenarios in which he goes into the study and starts the fight again. Maybe he would get told what he wants to know. Maybe he would be able to get Tsukishima to open up to him. But he knows it's unrealistic. Tsukishima is stubborn.

But he's stubborn too and he doesn't want to be the one to fix this. 

That's the problem. Neither one of them is willing to compromise and neither one plans on giving in. He knows that this is important and that's why Tsukishima won't tell him. So he stands up and steadies himself to leave the room, not bothering to care about his appearance. Third time's the charm, right?

He opens the door quietly, noticing the door to the study is closed as well. Steeling himself, he knocks.    
  
"Kei?"

The fae is writing in a journal on his desk on the opposite wall. Tsukishima set up a desk for Kageyama adjacent to his own, but he rarely uses it. Bookshelves line the walls filled with scrolls, parchment, and books all in the fae language. Tsukishima tried to bring some Japanese novels for him but gave up after the fifth book was left unread.   
  
Tsukishima finishes writing whatever he's thinking and turns to look at Kageyama. His eyes widen a fraction when taking in his appearance but he quickly settles his features. 

"Yes, Tobio?"

"Can we talk?" They're the only ones in the home, but Kageyama still closes the door behind him.

Tsukishima's eyes flash to the door. He sighs and puts down his pen, like he knows what this is about. Kageyama doesn't doubt if he does. He's definitely the smarter one out of the two.   
  
Tsukishima motions to the chair at Kageyama's rarely used desk. "Sure."

Somehow sitting in the chair makes Kageyama feel like he's in the principal's office, so he goes around to the edge of the desk and sits on it. He's closer to Tsukishima this way, able to look him in the eye without feeling inferior.    
  
He had intended on coming in to finish the fight he'd started, but Tsukishima looks like he's calmed down. Then again, he always gets that look on his face when Kageyama says his given name.    
  
"I had fun with you today."

Tsukishima's eyebrows scrunch together before he nods. The barest hint of a smile forms on the corner of his lips. 

"You mean you had fun beating me with your chance card games."

"Your game wasn't bad either." Kageyama's fingers trace the engraved edges of the wooden desk. "Is it too late to say I'm sorry for grabbing you?"

"No." Tsukishima's eyes trail down to his hands. "Did I hurt your wrists?"

"No." He looks down too. His knuckles are red, even though he was wearing the gloves. He hopes Tsukishima doesn't ask about it. "I was just really mad."

Tsukishima doesn't answer. That's the problem with talking to fae, they can't lie so they make sure they choose their words carefully. The silence seems to stretch on until Tsukishima clicks his tongue. 

"I know. I lost my temper too."

"I don't like fighting with you." Kageyama mutters. "I want us to get along, be friends."

"I would like that to." Tsukishima says, just as quiet. "To be friends." Only the way he says it sounds different.

The air around them is charged again, but it's so different from earlier. Before, it was all heat, an explosion waiting to happen. Now, it's electric and crackling like the sky before a thunderstorm. And Kageyama doesn't know what to do with it.   
  
"Um, good."

"Is that all you wanted to talk about?" Tsukishima's behavior isn't helping. He isn't offering anything and it leaves Kageyama feeling like he's grasping at straws.

"I don't- maybe?" Really, Kageyama doesn't know what he wanted to talk about. He just wants to be in Tsukishima's presence.

Tsukishima just looks at him. Kageyama knows there's something working through the fae's mind but he's never able to guess. He's about to ask when Tsukishima speaks.   
  
"You should bathe. You'll get sick like that in the cold."

Even Kageyama can recognize that as a cue to leave.    
  
"Yeah," He hops down off the desk. "I think I'll just go to bed after that."

"Okay. Good night." Tsukishima is already turning back to his writing. Kageyama fights the feeling of being dismissed. He isn't even sure if this helped.

He decides to hold his tongue and go take a bath. He's feeling a bit cold now anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Then what do you want?" Kageyama's voice is hard but it's the last thing he can think of to actually get Tsukishima to talk to him instead of just at him.  
> They're in each other's faces now, glaring hard at each other until Tsukishima moves, swift and all too graceful.
> 
> It takes Kageyama a beat to realize what's happening. Tsukishima's lips are on his.

He's still thinking about it when he wakes up the next day, though his thoughts are interrupted by the sun shining in through his window, glaring way too bright off the snow. Did it stop snowing overnight?    
  
It's certainly not any warmer as he rolls out of bed and pads over to the window, shielding his eyes from the blinding glare.    
  
Outside is a winter wonderland. Glistening snow covers the ground untouched, blanketing as far as he can see. The trees in their backyard are frosted over and their limbs hang heavy with icicles.

The first thing he thinks of is he wants to throw snowballs at Tsukishima. He backs away from the window and decides to get dressed now, remembering how cold it was the morning before. He bundles himself in a sweater and warm pants before leaving his room and goes downstairs.

Tsukishima isn't up yet. The house is quiet and too chilly for Kageyama's liking. He figures he can at least start another fire and warm the place up.

He doesn't make breakfast. He knows it would be nice to do it for a change but he would probably just end up burning everything. Instead he goes to the closet and puts on his jacket, gloves, and boots. He wants to go outside but he knows Tsukishima will yell at him so he should do it before he can tell him no.

Opening the door proves to be a bit of a challenge, but he wrenches the knob until it snaps open. There's a coating of ice on the outside of the knob and snow piled up to the door.    
  
It looks just as beautiful from here as it did from his window, and he takes a full breath of freezing air. Crisp, clean.    
  
The snow hasn't been touched by anything but winter birds that left tiny tracks in the coatings on the windowsills. It's almost too peaceful to mess up. But Kageyama can't stop his impulse to make a running jump into the first huge pile he sees.

The cold seeps into him almost instantaneously but it's worth it. He tries to stand up but the height of the snow makes it difficult. He starts pushing the snow around, trying to make some form of fort just in case Tsukishima will want to play along.   
  
He spends a good amount of time on it and is almost done with his construction when he hears Tsukishima call out to him from the door he left open. 

" _ Why _ are you outside?"

"Because it's fun!" Kageyama yells back. He's sure his face is flushed with the icy wind and he can't really feel his cheeks, but he grins anyway.

Tsukishima is still dressed in his pajamas with only a thick sweater to keep himself warm. The fae doesn't answer so Kageyama goes back to finishing off his structure. He looks back at the door except now Tsukishima is leaning against the door just watching him work. It's a bit weird but he chooses to ignore him and make more snowballs.

He has a good pile going. The snow is just wet enough to make decent packing and form nicely into shape. He and Tooru used to throw snowballs at each other during snowy days, though they were sort of underhanded and petty about it.

He's pulled out enough snow that he can see the grass underneath his feet. He didn't realize how much snow fell but from the look of it, he could guess about six inches or so. He pushes more snow around his fort, making a seat when he feels a snowball hit his back.   
  
"Come in Tobio. Breakfast is ready."

He whips around to see Tsukishima standing there innocently. The smirk on his face really gives him away.    
  
But breakfast? After that kind of full on sneak attack? Not likely.    
  
"Yeah, okay." He grabs a snowball from behind his back and sends it flying.

Luckily for Tsukishima he's quick. He immediately steps back and closes the door, using it as a shield right before impact. He opens the door just enough to yell out of. 

"If you don't come in soon, I'll eat everything."

Right on cue, Kageyama's stomach growls loudly. He would let the fight rest. For now.

Kageyama takes careful steps through the snow until he reaches the threshold hold of the door. When he steps through Tsukishima flashes back and pushes him back out before he can get inside. He wants to protest but Tsukishima is laying down a towel in front of the door. Then Tsukishima grabs his jacket and tugs him inside. He slips Kageyama's jacket off for him. Kageyama looks at him surprised but when they make eye contact he has to look down. He's not used to being taken care of like this, especially by Tsukishima.

"You're not dragging snow all over the house." Tsukishima says by way of excuse. "And you're soaked, how long were you out there?"

Kageyama shrugs and takes off his boots. "I don't know, since I woke up. What time is it?"

"Almost 10." Tsukishima tosses a dry towel over Kageyama's head. "Even your hair is wet. You need to be careful you don't get frostbite."

Kageyama rubs the towel into his hair. Kageyama will admit he's freezing but he didn't feel like it when he was outside. 

"It's fine. Haven't you ever played out in the snow?"

"Of course I have." The blond finally allows Kageyama to leave the front door. "I was a child once, you know."

Kageyama shrugs again. "Sometimes it doesn't seem like it." Kageyama takes off his socks for good measure and steps around Tsukishima and towards the kitchen. "Thanks for breakfast."

His guard clicks his tongue at him. "Your pants are soaked."

"That's what happens when you play in snow." Kageyama turns around and waits until he closes the door. "Would it make you feel better if I changed?"

"That will take too long." Tsukishima says and just pulls a blanket from the couch. "Just strip down, cover up, and I'll bring breakfast out here."

"Oh, okay." Kageyama takes the blanket, surprised by the change of events. 

Tsukishima is already gone to the kitchen so he hurries to the living room couch and does what he was told. He peels off his pants that were just starting to stick uncomfortably. Luckily his underwear is mostly dry so he doesn't feel completely exposed. He wraps the blanket around his waist and makes himself comfortable on the couch, waiting for Tsukishima to come back in with his food.

The fire is roaring and warm and Kageyama didn't realize how cold he was until now. The warmth pricks his skin where it had gone a bit numb, but it feels good, too.

Tsukishima comes back in a few minutes carrying two plates of food. It looks like the fae version of waffles again, surrounded by fruit making Kageyama light up. 

Kageyama would almost suspect he's still trying to make peace if Tsukishima didn't enjoy them as much as he does. Especially covered with strawberries like they are now.

"Here." One of the plates is shoved at him as Tsukishima sits down beside him, maybe a little too close. "Are you warming up?"

"Yeah." 

He doesn't want to admit Tsukishima was right so he just leaves it at that. He takes the plate and immediately shoves food in his mouth. They're still warm and it makes him feel even warmer. Now he just needs some hot chocolate and the snow day will be complete. Maybe he can convince Tsukishima to make some later.

They eat in comfortable silence, both of them ignoring manners and just shoveling the food in. Whatever tense energy that was between them yesterday is gone now, leaving only their usual companionship in place.

Kageyama feels completely relaxed. He probably should have eaten slower but it tasted so good he can't regret it now. Once he's done he rests lazily against the back of the couch and leaves the plate on his lap. He finds himself slipping against Tsukishima but he's too warm, full, and content to do anything about it.

"You're going to make a mess." Tsukishima tsks and takes the plate from him, only to set it with his on the side table. The shift makes Kageyama's head drop to Tsukishima's shoulder, but neither of them move. He swears Tsukishima's breathing picks up.

"But that's what you're here for." Kageyama tries to blink some of the sleep out of his eyes and lets himself put more weight onto Tsukishima. "To clean up after me."

"I'm not your maid, you brat."

"Not technically." Kageyama pulls the blanket further around him, silently reminding himself he's not wearing pants. "Actually you're very bad at cleaning."

"I grew up wealthy. I did not have to clean." Tsukishima defends himself with a small frown.

"I grew up wealthy. I had to clean." If he didn't clean his father would be furious with him. They were taught that their room was their own, his mother couldn't help him clean. Him and his brother had to keep their bathroom clean too. His father's punishments were unpleasant to say the least.

The more he looks back on it, the more he sees how abusive his father was even before it became physical.    
  
"I can't clean, and you can't cook. It works."

Kageyama adjusts his head to fit better on Tsukishima's shoulder. "I guess so. We make a good pair most of the time."

"Yeah." Tsukishima agrees, low and quiet. "We do."

Kageyama closes his eyes and acts like he's asleep. Honestly, if he fully relaxes he could fall asleep against Tsukishima but he wants to know what the fae will do. He's being surprisingly docile with him and he's curious how Tsukishima will act when he thinks he's not watching.

It takes a while of waiting, of controlling his breathing, for Tsukishima to move at all. Even then, it's slow. Tsukishima's arm shifts just a bit, slips behind Kageyama's back, settles over his ribs. It takes everything Kageyama has not to break his little facade when he feels the guard lean his cheek against his hair.

Kageyama puts all of his focus on keeping his heart from pounding, just in case Tsukishima could feel it. They've never treated each other like this before, so soft and careful. It almost makes him feel guilty, like he's taking advantage of his guard.

He's never been this physically close with anyone before. His father and Tooru never were the cuddly type, and his mother preferred short hugs. But this was nice. Neither he nor Tsukishima are verbally expressive people, maybe touch is better for them.

A few minutes later he heard Tsukishima's breath even out too, a sign that he was asleep. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad to join him. He is tired and comfortable anyway. He gently pushes his head closer to Tsukishima and let's his morning activities catch up to him.

He wakes up alone, on his side taking up the whole couch. His neck aches a bit, and he's groggy in that too-much-sleep sort of way.    
  
"Kei?" He calls out. He doesn't need anything, his mouth just moves before his brain tells it to.

He's still covered in his blanket but he slowly sits up, still trying to coax out the soreness in his body. Their breakfast plates are gone but Kageyama doesn't hear anything coming from the kitchen. He wraps the blanket tighter around his waist and quietly starts to wander the house trying to find the fae.

"Kei?" He tries again as he pads up the stairs. At the top of the stairs he can hear the shower running. So that's where his guard was.

He can't help but be disappointed. Instead he goes back to his room and gets dressed. He should probably bathe too but he figured he could just do it later.

Tsukishima comes out a few minutes later, a towel around his neck. "Tobio, were you calling me?"

"Oh." Tsukishima's hair is still wet and periodically dripping water. He's wearing a plain, old looking t-shirt and what he's come to know as the fae version of sweatpants but Kageyama likes the casualness between them. "I just wanted to know where you were. It's not important."

"Oh." The blond takes a breath, seems to put his emotional wall back up. "If you don't need anything, I'm going to my room."

"O-okay." Kageyama watches Tsukishima go back to his room. 

Maybe it wasn't as casual between them than he thought. He shrugs it off and decides he might as well clean himself off too. Plus he needs to warm himself up. The bathroom is still steamy from Tsukishima and it instantly makes him feel sticky.

He spends his entire bath wondering what to do with the rest of his day. He's sick of sleeping, and he doesn't really want to play in the snow once it gets dark.

He hopes Tsukishima doesn't want to spend the rest of his day at his desk. They still can't go anywhere, not that he would want to at this time of day. Or maybe he can just annoy Tsukishima into giving him attention. At least that sounds entertaining.

He settles on that option as he gets dressed again, warm and clean. Tsukishima's door is open, and it's a good sign Kageyama won't be yelled at for talking to him.

He walks right in. The first thing he sees is Tsukishima at his small writing desk so he hops himself up on Tsukishima's bed and turns his head, looking at Tsukishima. 

"What are you up to?"

"Writing." Tsukishima mutters. 

His pen whisks across the paper in smooth arcs, delicate swirls, and sharp edges. He's writing in Fae so Kageyama can't read it, but it's still enchanting to watch.

"About what?" He decides to channel his inner six year old. He can't wait to ask 'why' over and over.

"Just a letter to my grandfather. It's his birthday next week."

"You've never mentioned your grandfather." Kageyama rolls over on his side trying to make himself more comfortable. "Can you tell him happy birthday from me too?"

"Sure." Tsukishima nods, not looking away from his writing. "He lives in a village outside of the kingdom walls. He doesn't travel much in his old age."

"When was the last time you saw him?"

"A few years ago." Tsukishima blows on the ink to help it dry. "My brother and I go see him every once in a while."

"How old is he?" Kageyama is slowly realizing that he is actually kinda interested in this conversation.

"He's turning 558 this year." He says it like it's no big deal, and Kageyama knows it's really not that big of a deal for a Fae. But it's still startling.

It takes Kageyama longer than he would like to recover but it actually makes him realize something. He never asked Tsukishima his age. He just always assumed they were about the same. 

"How old are you?"

"Older than you." The blond answers smoothly.

"Well that's obvious." Kageyama pouts and turns on his back. "Ushijima is like 90 or something. You look younger than him."

"There you go asking questions again." For a moment, Kageyama thinks Tsukishima might ignore him again, but the guard glances up briefly from folding his letter. "I'm 69."

"Wow." His father isn't even that old yet. "Does it feel weird to live that long? Especially around me."

"I've never given it a second thought."

"I guess not. It's normal for you." Kageyama never thought about being older too much. He liked the idea so he could get some independence but he never thought about being near seventy and still be considered young.

He bounces slightly on the bed for something to do. The movement is a fun distraction.    
  
"I suppose that age is amazing to someone so young." Tsukishima mutters.

"I mean, living to your nineties is normal. I guess the amazing part is that you still look my age." Kageyama moves his eyes back to Tsukishima but doesn't stop bouncing. "You could pass as my classmate."

Tsukishima frowns like that somehow offends him, but really Kageyama thinks that's just one of his default expressions.    
  
"Somehow, I don't think we would be in the same class."

Kageyama rolls his eyes and grumbles out, "Shut up."

The muffled laugh he gets is enough to forgive the comment. He likes it when Tsukishima laughs.

"Yeah yeah, you're smart." Kageyama is still trying to figure out some sort of weakness in Tsukishima. He hasn't found much. "But you still don't know how to clean."

"Do you always have such witty comebacks?" Tsukishima drawls as he seals the letter into an envelope.

Kageyama flops down and lays flat on his back, staring at the ceiling. 

"Maybe you should be smart enough to realize I don't want to talk about how stupid I am."

And then Tsukishima says something Kageyama never expected him to say in a million years.    
  
"I don't think you're stupid."

"Well, you'd be the first." He just wants to play it off. He didn't want Tsukishima to make this into something that sounds almost sentimental. "Except my mom...and maybe Tooru-nii. Maybe."

Tsukishima just looks at him with an unreadable expression before looking away again.    
  
"Right. Anyway, did you need something?"

"No." Kageyama turns on his side, facing Tsukishima. "I just wanted to annoy you."

"The usual, then?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"It's fine." Tsukishima says with another half hidden smile.

Kageyama picks at Tsukishima's blanket. This didn't go as expected, he really wanted to get a rise out of him not some odd sense of understanding. 

"Did you want to do something?"

"We can play a board game." Tsukishima suggests. "Our version of go is essentially the same."

Kageyama lifts himself from the bed and straightens out his clothes. "Sure. I haven't played that since I was a kid."

Somehow, they make it through that game without either of them flipping the board over.   
  
That's how they spend the next few days; hanging out and waiting out the snow, bantering lightly. They don't share another moment like on the couch, but it's nothing bad.    
  
It's almost a week until he hears that Iwaizumi is back, and the next day Tooru comes over, unannounced as usual but no less welcome.    
  
"Tobio-chan!" Kageyama hears his brother before he sees him. "I'm coming inside now!"

Kageyama is in the kitchen, just finishing up the dishes after breakfast. Tsukishima is hovering, making little comments about the bubbles or just some pokes at him. It's easy enough to ignore but Kageyama can see the moment Tsukishima wishes he was somewhere else. But Kageyama won't let him escape too easily.   
  
"We're in the kitchen."

Tsukishima shoots him a dirty look, but Tooru is already popping through the doorway in a flurry of snow white fur and floppy brown hair.    
  
"Making my brother do chores, Tsukishima?"

"I just fed him." Tsukishima leans against the counter and crosses his arms. His bad mood is already setting it. "Plus, we don't have servants that take care of us day and night."

"And I don't want any." Kageyama tacks on before Tooru can even offer. He wipes his hands on a towel and gives his brother his full attention. "How is Iwa-chan? Did you see him?"

Oikawa immediately smiles. "Iwa-chan is good; I ate dinner with him last night." He looks so happy it's almost strange. Even after he started being serious with Ushijima, he never seemed so bright. "He's staying for a few days in the inn. He'll be visiting soon, I'm sure."

Tsukishima seems to notice the change too and he changes the subject abruptly. "But that's not why you came. Is it, Oikawa?"

"Well aren't you being impatient!" Oikawa's tone is covered in fake sweetness that is borderline mocking. But he doesn't keep his attention on Tsukishima for too long. When he speaks to his brother he just sounds excited. "But he's right. I wanted to tell you first." Oikawa pauses for dramatic effect but he’s the one who seems impatient to share the news. "I accepted Ushijima's proposal! We're getting married!

The moment of absolute silence that follows is probably not what he expected.    
  
"Uh," Kageyama starts. "Weren't you going to...not do that?"

"Well..." Oikawa trails off looking agitated with a slight hint of disappointment. "We've changed. I, um..." His eyes flash briefly to Tsukishima and he pouts even more. Like he doesn't want to admit anything in front of him. "I love him."

"Okay." Kageyama says simply.   
  
"Okay? Just okay?" His brother raises his voice in a bit of hysteria, but Kageyama just nods.   
  
"Yeah. If you love him, then that's enough."

Oikawa doesn't seem satisfied. "Are you even happy for me?"

"This isn't a lie, right?" 

Kageyama allows worry to slip into his features. He can't understand how his brother could fall in love with the very person that made him so unhappy not so long ago.

"No!" Oikawa looks angry. It's been a long time since he's seen that look in his eyes. "Why would I lie about this! Things change Tobio." Oikawa takes a step back like he's trying to find the best option to storm out. "Maybe you should be more observant to what's happening around you."

Tsukishima speaks up, suddenly beside Kageyama and looking far angrier than the situation calls for.    
  
"Don't you dare bring that into this."

"I'm not. This isn't about you. But now that you mention it..." Oikawa glares at Tsukishima but he deflates slightly and his eyes shift back to his brother. "You get along with him now. He's the actual person who used you as bait to get me to come back. Your feelings changed for him. Why can't mine change too?"

"They can. I was just checking. I'm allowed to worry about my brother." Kageyama stammers out. His eyes flit to Tsukishima, but the guard won't look at him, so he turns back to his brother. "I just want you to be happy. For real."

Oikawa's eyes are on him for a moment before he looks away. He can't tell what his brother is feeling now but he can see he's thinking carefully about how he’s going to respond.   
  
"I'm sorry for yelling." It almost sounds forced but the fact that he is apologizing at all means a lot. "I'm happy with him. I promise."

Kageyama moves forward and all at once he's wrapped around his big brother, face in his soft coat. 

"Then I'm happy for you, Tooru-nii."

Oikawa's arms come up a hesitant moment later and lets Tobio hold him. They're still working out their relationship but Tobio is happy about where it is now.   
  
"Thank you, Tobio-chan."

"Does this mean you're going to have his babies too?" That gets Kageyama shoved away a second later, Oikawa's nose wrinkled at him.

"God no." Oikawa pats his shoulder. "One step at a time. But I was hoping you could be my best man. I don't know how they do weddings here but I want you to be part of it."

Kageyama absolutely beams, but then frowns again. "What about Iwa-chan? I want to do it but...he's your best friend."

Oikawa shakes his head. "I love Iwa-chan but I want it to be you. It's okay, he'll understand. Actually he'll be happy about it."

"Okay. Okay, yeah. Of course I'll do it." 

The smile is back to Kageyama's face, stretching his cheeks and making his heart feel full. A year ago, Tooru never would have asked him to even have dinner together, nevertheless be his best man for his wedding.

"Good. Good." Oikawa breaks the hug but he's still smiling. "You can bring a date. Actually I'm not even sure when we'll have it. Not soon, Ushijima is so busy right now."

"You always liked Spring. Maybe next year?"

Oikawa chuckles. "Yeah, that sounds perfect."

Oikawa is in a great mood the rest of his visit, which makes Kageyama feel light and happy too. The emotions match the sun that's finally pouring through the heavy clouds outside.

Oikawa stays for most of the day, which is nice because Kageyama hasn't seen him in a few weeks. Tsukishima disappeared about an hour after his brother arrived, which is the only sour point of the visit for him. But he doesn't let it bother him too much, he's too excited with his brother's attention.

They talk about weddings, about food, about Ushijima himself. Oikawa insists that the king give him a 'proper engagement party' Tobio sort of thinks it all sounds like way too much.    
  
"I'm marrying a king, that's how it has to be." Oikawa defends his statements.

"Yeah, and you want everyone to be envious." Tobio states with some good natured humor. At least he thinks he's funny, he hopes his brother thinks so too. And since he didn't respond badly, he knows he's right. "Plus you'll get a lot of presents."

"I know!" Oikawa gushes. He doesn't seem in the least offended. "Besides, everyone should be envious. This human has the king of Shira wrapped around his finger."

Kageyama can't help but laugh. It's been a long time since he's seen his brother have even a fraction of this kind of happiness. 

"I think you achieved that before you even liked him."

"Even my hatred is charming." Oikawa winks and glances outside. The sun will set soon, and Oikawa still has to make the walk back to the castle. "I should leave before it gets dark and even colder."

"You're right." Kageyama sighs. He would offer that Oikawa stay the night but he knows Oikawa wants to be with his fiancé right now. Kageyama stands up and goes for Oikawa's jacket hanging on the back of a kitchen chair. "Thanks for telling me first. I'm excited for you."

"Thanks, Tobio-chan." He gets a warm smile that's so unusual, but not out of place. "You should come have dinner with us next week. Maybe Iwa-chan will be around too."

"Yes!" Kageyama answers quickly in his own excitement. "I'll make Kei come too. Sorry he's been, umm, unfriendly."

"Isn't that just how he is?" Oikawa scoffs, but it's light as if he knows better.

"I guess so." Kageyama wants to say it's not true. Tsukishima does treat him fairly well but their personalities clash a lot. "Actually, can I ask you something before you go?"

"What is it, my dear little brother?" The way Oikawa seems so eager to answer is a little unsettling, but Kageyama pushes on.

"Did you say something to Kei? When we went to Kuroo-san's house." Kageyama feels a little bad about going behind Tsukishima's back, especially since it's been a week since they had the fight. "He seemed mad at you."

"Not really." Oikawa shrugs his coat on. "Maybe he just doesn't like me."

"Well I know he doesn't. But it seemed worse." Oikawa has no reason to lie to him so maybe Tsukishima just misunderstood something. "Whatever, it's probably not important."

Oikawa glances at his ring with a little knowing smile. "You'll figure it out. Bye, Tobio-chan."

"Bye, Tooru-nii." 

Tobio feels a bit lost after the conversation but he isn't sure if it's even worth bringing it up to Tsukishima again. Kageyama walks to the bottom of the staircase and yells up so Tsukishima can hear him. 

"He left. You can come out of hiding now."

"I wasn't hiding, I was avoiding." Tsukishima comes out of his bedroom looking around like Tooru might reappear at any moment.

"Well you can stop avoiding." Kageyama mumbles and walks away back to the living room. 

He knows his brother can be a handful but he thought Tsukishima would be used to it by now. It's just annoying that they can't seem to get along.

"What's your problem?" Tsukishima says as he comes down the stairs.

Kageyama doesn't answer. They've been in such a good state that he doesn't want to ruin it. The only problem is that if he doesn't answer Tsukishima will just get angry instead of annoyed. 

"Why do you hate him so much?"

"I've told you before, he sticks his nose where it doesn't belong." Tsukishima crosses his arms when he reaches the staircase landing.

"But he's my brother." Kageyama sighs and tries to keep himself calm. "Can't you try to get along."

"He's your brother, but he isn't mine. I don't see why I should have to play nice."

He can't even use Tsukishima's brother as an excuse. Akiteru is a great person and has been nothing but nice to him. He's always seen people fawn over his brother but they've only seen his fake, pleasing side.   
  
"Because I want you two to get along."

"So?" He's pushing the line here. He can see Tsukishima's defenses go up and it's like watching a dog's hackles rise. "We don't always get what we want."

"Obviously not." 

Kageyama doesn't want to fight right now. He was in such a good mood and then it's now steadily being brought down because of this. He shakes his head and walks away to the kitchen and hopes that Tsukishima doesn't follow him.

"Oh, so you're mad now." He can hear the eye roll.

"I'm not mad. I-" Kageyama sighs and leans against the counter, his back to Tsukishima who has entered the room. "I don't know, but I don't want to fight. It was just a good day." The last sentence was mostly to himself.

He knew he should have just let Tsukishima be. But now that it's started, Tsukishima is fully antagonizing him.   
  
"You don't know? You mean you don't know why something matters to you?"

"No, I know why it matters to me." Kageyama turns around with a huff. "I want you two to get along but you're being difficult about it. I feel like I'm stuck in the middle with the two of you."

Tsukishima's eyes are dark and almost mocking. Sometimes Kageyama forgets he really does have a mean streak.    
  
"Then maybe you should pick a side."

"What? Why?" That's not fair. Why should he have to choose between his brother and his only friend here? "I don't want to choose between you. Do you want me to not see my brother again?"

"You want to be in my life so badly, I thought you would want to understand me a bit more than your brother that goes off and marries the king he spent so long hating."

"He's not marrying him on a whim!" Kageyama pushes himself off of the counter stepping closer to Tsukishima. "And how am I supposed to understand you if you won't tell me anything? You just brush me off when I ask and then you get mad at me."

"Because you don't know when to quit, but then you back out again!" He hates the way Tsukishima can look down at him. He's never felt so short in his life. "I have no idea what you want between us!"

"I want us to stop fighting!" Kageyama thinks that's the main reason. Tsukishima wants to be friends right? It's never seemed like anything different but he feels like Tsukishima is holding back. They've been living together for months and even if they've created a rhythm there is still plenty of fighting. He's not sure if friends is even the right word for it. "I want you to stop shutting me out everytime I ask you a damn question."

"I can never tell what you're thinking, and it drives me insane." Tsukishima growls, rubbing his eyes under his glasses as if Kageyama is the one being frustrating.

"Then what do you want?" Kageyama's voice is hard but it's the last thing he can think of to actually get Tsukishima to talk to him instead of just at him.

They're in each other's faces now, glaring hard at each other until Tsukishima moves, swift and all too graceful.   
  
It takes Kageyama a beat to realize what's happening. Tsukishima's lips are on his.

Tsukishima's hands hold him on either side of his neck, keeping him still. His lips are warm but it only takes a second for Kageyama to respond back. It's surprising how good it feels and he doesn't let himself question it, not yet anyway. His own hands cling onto Tsukishima's shirt, needing some sort of steadiness.

The way Tsukishima's lips move is still angry, but he's so gentle it throws Kageyama off balance a bit.

Tsukishima slowly pushes Kageyama backwards until he hits the counter he was leaning on before. It's not rough and he doesn't feel trapped. Even when Tsukishima's body presses closer to him he just feels warm.

They're both breathing heavy when they part, but it's only for a quick breath and they're moving back in.

Kageyama's hands move and wrap around Tsukishima's back, one holding his waist. Kageyama can feel the energy pick up from Tsukishima. He's less rushed and more confident in his touches which only draw Kageyama in more. This definitely wasn't what he expected to happen.

"Kei-" He gets out before Tsukishima nips at his bottom lip like an admonishment.    
  
"No talking."

So he doesn't. He leans back in and lets Tsukishima take over again. Arms wrap around his waist pulling him closer to Tsukishima's warmth.

They start to slow down, breathe between slotting their lips together. They sync, start a rhythm too natural to be accidental.

Tsukishima breaks the kiss only to move down Kageyama's jaw. They're soft kisses that leave him breathless in a new way. When Tsukishima reaches the soft spot near his ear he can't help but let out a soft gasp.

"Kei, I-" That earns him another hot kiss against his jaw and Tsukishima's voice rumbling low in his ear.   
  
"Didn't I tell you not to talk?"    
  
But Kageyama has to talk. He has to ask, "Kei, what are we doing?"

"I'm doing what I want." Tsukishima answers, his voice still rough. He brings his head up and looks Kageyama in the eye. "Are you doing what you want?"

Is this what he wants? He didn't really think about it before, but there's no way he wants to stop now, so he nods.   
  
"Yeah, I am."

"Then stop talking." 

Kageyama swears he sees relief passover Tsukishima's face but he's too distracted by the lips on his neck to remember. Tsukishima resumes as if nothing happened.

Later, he'll wonder if this is how all kisses feel or if it's like this because it's Tsukishima. It's a pull he doesn't understand, but it keeps him holding onto the blond's shirt, exposing more of his throat with each mind numbing kiss.

Tsukishima's lips make their way down to his collarbone. Kageyama has to remind himself from speaking especially when Tsukishima starts sucking. Instead it pulls a quiet moan out of his throat that just leaves him embarrassed.

Kageyama tries to wiggle away, embarrassment burning in his cheeks, but Tsukishima's hand anchors on his hips and keeps him still.    
  
"Did you like that?"

Kageyama doesn't want to use his voice just in case any other noises come out but Tsukishima isn't going to look at him. He's still working on that same spot no doubt trying to leave a mark. He must not answer quickly enough because Tsukishima bites him lightly, earning another gasp from Kageyama.   
  
"Yes."

Tsukishima's breath catches against his neck before a hand is in his hair, pulling just slightly to tilt his head more.

Tsukishima moves his lips to a slightly higher spot, somewhere a bit harder to hide. Kageyama can't do much more than hang on while the fae is focused on his work.

It sends Kageyama's mind reeling. What was going on? Weren't they fighting just a few minutes ago? Why is he allowing this to continue?

"K-Kei-" Kageyama stutters but Tsukishima just hears it like a moan. 

Tsukishima returns his attention back to his lips, capturing them once again. It's a little harder than before and leaves Kageyama just as breathless.

He tries to think, but all his brain is doing is receiving pleasure signals from what seems like every peripheral nerve he has. It's almost like he doesn't have a choice but to just open his mouth and meet Tsukishima's tongue with his own.

Tsukishima's hands are roaming up and down his back, pushing him closer so there's barely any space between them. Kageyama is so lost in Tsukishima's lips that he doesn't notice. It's only when one hand wanders south and curves around his ass that Kageyama reactively breaks the kiss and pushes Tsukishima back but only fractionally.

Tsukishima takes a step back, shoves his hands into his pockets.   
  
"Okay." He says, like he understands what just happened. Kageyama hopes at least one of them does.

Kageyama is panting, still trying to wrap his head around everything. He's never thought about kissing Tsukishima before but it felt so good he couldn't stop. He didn't want to stop. Tsukishima is still so close to him but it doesn't look like he's going to continue.   
  
"Okay..?"

"That's your limit. I'm okay with that. You don't have to shove me."

"You surprised me." Kageyama is referring to the last touch but really, everything was a shock. 

He wants to ask, anything, something to get an explanation on what just happened but the tension of their earlier fight is gone. How long has Tsukishima wanted to kiss him?

"I know." Tsukishima doesn't offer much more than that. His mouth moves into a frown for just a moment before he's giving Kageyama a small smile. "It's been a long evening. You should go to bed."

"Yeah. Okay." 

Kageyama easily agrees just so he can get away from Tsukishima to think. He can't even get himself to look at the fae before he's rushing to the stairs. Not running, he's still walking, but there’s a definite speed in his steps. He doesn't know what he expected but not for Tsukishima to dismiss him so quickly, even with the smile.

The smile was confusing in and of itself. What the hell was that soft look for? They were just fighting, and their impromptu make out session wasn't exactly gentle.    
  
Kageyama shuts himself in his room and lies face down on the bed. His head feels too full.

He wants to sleep. He wants this to be a dream. He can't even expect what tomorrow is going to bring them. How is he supposed to face him after everything? Tsukishima was so casual about it. Was he supposed to be casual too? This is too much to think about.   
  
He tries his best to sleep, but he's up until the wee hours of the morning, tossing and turning with increasing frustration. When he finally does fall asleep it's fitful and he wakes up annoyed.

More than anything he's annoyed at Tsukishima. Sure he didn't stop what was happening but doesn't it usually mean something when people kiss? He didn't even look bothered or confused, just the same as ever. Kageyama doesn't even know what to say so he won't say anything. 

He'll make Tsukishima bring it up first.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're not a problem, Tobio. You're..." The blond doesn't finish his sentence. His gaze pins Kageyama to the spot.  
> "What?" Kageyama questions, a bit breathless. "I'm what?"  
> "You're...not just my job anymore."

It takes weeks for Tsukishima to bring their makeout session up again, with every day more frustrating than the last. Tsukishima takes his good sweet time letting that tension build back up until one night Kageyama slams down his plate a little too hard and Tsukishima glances up at him, impassive as usual.    
  
"What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing." Kageyama wants to eat in peace. He doesn't want to admit anything to Tsukishima. Especially not about how he's still thinking about their kiss so far after it happened. "Nothing at all."

"Sure." Tsukishima sighs. "Glad to see you're okay with lying to me."

Kageyama grips the fork in his hand tighter. Tsukishima is not going to guilt him. "Sure and you not telling me the whole truth is much better."

"I can't lie." Tsukishima shoots back, defensive already. "I have to have a way to protect my privacy."

"Whatever." Kageyama sighs and turns slightly away from Tsukishima. It's a good point and he doesn't want Tsukishima to think he's tense about lying. It's frustrating but probably not the main issue. "This isn't about lying or privacy anyway so just drop it, I guess."

"Are you okay?" Tsukishima asks, finally.

It's more of an honest question than he ever thought Tsukishima would ask. Most of his concern is thinly laced under sarcasm and most of the time it takes too long for Kageyama to catch it. He wants to brush it off but since they were on the topic of lying, he knows that Tsukishima would react badly. Still, he doesn't know how to describe his feelings.   
  
"Maybe not."

"Maybe?" Tsukishima is already standing up to collect their dishes. They both know their appetites are gone now.

"I haven't been sleeping well." Kageyama leaves out the reason why, their kiss. Tsukishima may have started it but he definitely didn't try to stop what was happening. If he's honest with himself, he can't fully blame Tsukishima.

The blond sets the plates in the sink and comes a bit too close, eyes narrowed as he slaps a palm to Kageyama's forehead.    
  
"Are you ill?"

Only of mind.   
  
Kageyama reaches up and lightly holds Tsukishima's hand, pulling it off. His body feels tired and he's in no mood to start anything. 

"I feel fine."

His hand stays put over Tsukishima's, despite his brain telling his muscles to let go. Tsukishima looks down at their hands like he might pull away. But then the worst possible thing happens. Tsukishima kisses him again.

Just like before, Kageyama falls into the kiss. It's much more gentle than their first. There's still an edge of uncertainty but without the fire of a fight, it feels completely different. There's no hard presses or guiding hands. Kageyama just finds his eyes fluttering closed, sinking into the feeling.

It's so peaceful that he nearly stumbles when Tsukishima ends the kiss as suddenly as it began.    
  
"Still feel 'fine'?"

Kageyama can't answer. Not only did he kiss him again but it feels so different than before it's like whiplash.   
  
"Why did you kiss me again?"

"I wanted to."

"Why do you want to?"

"I don't know yet." Tsukishima says, speaking in that low, velvety voice that has Kageyama's mouth going dry. "But I know I've wanted to for a while now."

Kageyama sighs at the answer. It is good enough, he thinks. It's good enough not to press for more. If he presses, Tsukishima will not say anymore.    
  
"Can you warn me the next time you want to kiss me?"

Tsukishima's eyes haze over with uncertainty, just for a moment. "Will you still let me, if I ask?"

"Maybe." Kageyama almost wants to say no but he hasn't stopped Tsukishima before. His pride is keeping him from being honest. "It depends on how mad I am at you."

"I'll keep that in mind."    
  
And that's the end of it, for a few days. Somehow the non-answers Tsukishima gave settle Kageyama's mind enough that he can sleep well, and the tension between them isn't as high.

They don't even fight as much as normal. There is this odd sense of neutrality and anticipation between them. 

The snow eventually melts enough that they can finally escape the house and do some shopping. It's a bit unfortunate that Tsukishima still has to be with him in town, being his guard. But the fresh air is wonderful to breathe in.

"I want to stop by the bakery on our way home." Tsukishima says one day when they're coming out of a shop with a large basket filled with fish and fresh vegetables. "Your brother likes those spiced breads, right?"

Kageyama freezes making Tsukishima pull him away from the door so other people can come through. "Um, milk bread. He likes milk bread."

"Right." Tsukishima nods like he's cataloging the information. Like it's not out of character for him to even ask. "That stuff."

Kageyama can't help but hope that this is a start for Tsukishima at least trying to get along with his brother. Oikawa loves presents and he would probably give a sincere reaction to the gift. Kageyama doesn't want to risk it. If this is the first step to them getting along it's worth keeping quiet about; Tsukishima will tell him if it's important. So he just nods and follows the fae as he walks down the road.

Their hands brush together as they walk, and every once in a while Tsukishima puts his hand on Kageyama's back to guide him one way or another. That's something that's been happening a lot more. These casual, mindless touches.

Tsukishima just seems softer these days, more relaxed. He hasn't tried to kiss him again but that doesn't mean Kageyama can't feel the sense of intimacy developing. And now he's curiously asking about his brother. Kageyama never thought something like this could be possible.

They buy the milk bread (or the equivalent to it) at a bakery, and some candied strawberries for Tsukishima, and they're on their way back home.

Kageyama feels like he should be anticipating something as they get back to the house. He knows Tsukishima doesn't like the milk bread so he won't eat the bread. But he can't get himself to ask about it, or talk in general. Once they're inside with coats off and shoes put away, Tsukishima goes straight to the kitchen to put away the food.

"My brother is coming over tomorrow." Tsukishima says when he comes out. "I'm going to make the chicken we bought and- why are you looking at me like that?"

"Nothing. It's just..." Kageyama walks closer, heading towards the kitchen. He's thirsty from the trip but he wants to ask Tsukishima. "I'm just surprised you asked about my brother."

He walks by the blond, but not without Tsukishima's hand brushing his back as he passes.    
  
"I'm trying." Tsukishima says. 

Kageyama knows what he means. He's trying to make him happy, to make up for the ways he's upset him before.

"Thank you." Kageyama doesn't pause in getting his drink but he still continues the conversation. He doesn't want Tsukishima to think this isn't important to him. "I'm glad. What made you change your mind?"

"You." Tsukishima gives him one of those smiles that have become more frequent as of late.

It makes him flustered. He pours himself the water and takes a long sip just so he can think about how he wants to respond. He almost just wants to leave it at that and not try to dig any deeper. He's not sure if he wants to know. So he sets his glass down and changes the subject instead.   
  
"Is it just your brother or are your parents coming too?"

"Just Akiteru." It's worth noting the way Tsukishima clips the words like it somehow annoys him.

"It's been a long time since we've seen your brother. I'm glad he's coming." Kageyama tries to ease his tone. It's surprising Tsukishima would be annoyed by his brother, they've been getting along better in the past few months.

"It will be good to see him." Tsukishima agrees. "I'm sort of relieved my parents are not coming along."   
  
It's an honest confession, an open invitation for Kageyama to pry.

Kageyama takes a step closer to him. "Why? I thought you liked it when your parents visit. I know I do."

"I don't need them pestering me about settling down." Tsukishima sighs. "They've been pressing it the last few months."

Kageyama never thought of that. Tsukishima looks around his age, maybe a year or so older but he guesses even fae don't have extended childhoods. He never thought of it mostly because it seemed like Tsukishima had already settled with him. Kageyama leans against the counter next to Tsukishima. 

"What did you do before you became my guard?"

"I was in the military, intelligence division." He shouldn't be surprised by that, but somehow Tsukishima doesn't fit the image of a soldier.

Kageyama snorts. "This seems a bit like a step down then."

Tsukishima frowns and Kageyama almost regrets laughing about it. "I thought being a part of the royal guard would be what I wanted. But here I am."

Kageyama tries not to feel offended by the comment. It's not his fault the King wouldn't let him go home. He thought Tsukishima was even beginning to enjoy their time together. They've even kissed, multiple times.   
  
"Never thought about asking Ushijima to switch you out? Let me be someone else's problem."

"You're not a problem, Tobio. You're..." The blond doesn't finish his sentence. His gaze pins Kageyama to the spot.

"What?" Kageyama questions, a bit breathless. "I'm what?"

"You're...not just my job anymore."

"So, we're friends?" Kageyama says the word hesitantly. It doesn't seem right and he leaves off the kissing part. He doesn't want to jump to anything and Tsukishima has never said that he liked him before.   
  
And really, Kageyama has never felt in danger the whole time he's been here. His brother told him once before that Tsukishima was mostly here to make sure he didn't run off but he never wanted to do that either. If he thinks about it, this place is home to him now. Not just because he knows he will be in the fae realm forever now, but he feels more at peace than he ever did before.

He can't imagine home without Tsukishima's steady presence either. The blond's silence and snarky brand of humor has become something of a fondness to him now.    
  
"I wouldn't trust anyone else to watch you anyway." Tsukishima changes the subject, dodges the task of labeling what they are. "My parents would never understand that."

Kageyama picks his glass back up, intending on drinking but he wants to ask Tsukishima first. "If Ushijima tells you that you don't have to watch me anymore, that no one has to, would you stay?"

"Would you want me to?"

"I-" Kageyama pauses before taking a sip of water. He doesn't have to think so hard about the answer. "I think so, yes."

"Then I would stay." Tsukishima says. It's quiet, but no less firm. Something in Kageyama's lungs flutters.

"Cool." Kageyama drinks the rest of his water to drown out the awkwardness of that reply.  _ Cool. He really just said cool. _

He wants to flee, the conversation turning more sentimental than he wanted it to. It's late enough that he shouldn't leave the house but he can't get himself to move. Tsukishima is still looking at him but it's not a look he's ever seen before.

He braces himself for another unexpected kiss, but it never comes. Tsukishima touches his arm for a brief moment, and then he's closing his eyes as he moves to walk out of the room, the look fading from view.

Kageyama can't move, feeling unsatisfied and out of place. Tsukishima has never walked away from him before. Even when they fight it is always Kageyama storming off. But he can't follow. He can barely get himself to put his glass in the sink.

He hears Tsukishima climb the stairs and shut the door to his room. Kageyama gets the message. The moment is over.

Kageyama releases a breath and tries to force the disappointment away. There's not much more for him to do downstairs so he ends up following suit and goes to his room. The house is so quiet, he doesn't know what to do with himself.

For the first time, he allows himself to think about Tsukishima in a different way. In the way that they would come home to each other, share a meal and a warm bed. In the way that they would be more than housemates, or whatever it is they are.

It sounds...nice. It sounds similar to his brother and the King. But he doesn't want to marry Tsukishima, he doesn't want to marry anyone. He's only 16, he's never even dated anyone before. 

But they've been playing house for so long he can't even tell when they crossed the line. Even when the kissing started, it didn't seem too out of place.

Maybe that's what he likes; the natural progression. There's no labels, no awkward conversations about feelings. He doesn't know a word for how he feels about Tsukishima, or a concrete idea of where he wants to take this. But he's sure he likes the thought of being kissed goodnight.

It's always Tsukishima that's initiated everything. And even if he didn't stop Tsukishima, maybe the fae wanted more too. And right now he just feels lonely. Even if they just sit in silence, it would be better than this.

He doesn't give himself time to change his mind or chicken out. He changes into his pajamas and heads straight to Tsukishima's room to knock on the door.   
  
"What?" Tsukishima's voice is a little muffled from inside, but not unkind.

"Can I come in?" He'll explain once he's inside. It would almost be too sad to ask through the door.

"Sure."    
  
He shouldn't be surprised that Tsukishima is midway through getting dressed when he opens the door, considering that the Fae seem to not have the same embarrassment of nudity as humans. Tsukishima, to his credit, at least covers himself for Kageyama's sake.

Kageyama quickly looks down, now having two reasons to feel embarrassed. He ignores one and speaks as if he's not affected. "Can I sleep in here tonight? It's um, a bit too quiet."

The following silence isn't nearly as bad as Tsukishima's stare on him. He nearly calls it quits and says never mind, but Tsukishima finally breaks his stare.   
  
"Alright. Don't keep me up."

Kageyama nods and walks slowly to the bed, almost like he's watching out for anything that could jump out at him. He's been in Tsukishima's room plenty of times, he's even had a few impromptu naps in his bed but he was always by himself and never under any covers. Even if he is a bit nervous, he also feels more calm than he expected he would. It makes it worse that Tsukishima isn't taking his eyes off of him, like Tsukishima himself is watching for a cue.

Kageyama pouts and crawls into the bed, making himself comfortable. Even after he's settled Tsukishima hasn't moved. Awkwardly, Kageyama looks everywhere but at him until he huffs and glances at Tsukishima. 

"Well. It's your bed. Are you getting in?"

"Yeah. Move over."

Kageyama moves over even though there's still room, his bed isn't that small but he just plays along. Tsukishima lies down on his back and stares at the ceiling not saying a word. Kageyama thinks it's still better than being on his own but it's starting to feel a bit awkward.

"Tobio." Tsukishima breaks him out of his thoughts. "Can I touch you?"

"I gue- yeah." Kageyama knows he doesn't mean anything suggestive by it. And even if he did, he isn't sure if he would say no. He even scoots back over a fraction to get closer.

The touch is gentle, just a hand on his. It's almost too innocent. Too sweet.    
  
"You were lonely, right?" Tsukishima says. "That's why you're here."

"Yeah." Kageyama realizes that must be what it was. When Tsukishima left him downstairs it didn't feel right anymore. He didn't want to be by himself. "A bit out of place."

"Sorry. If I stayed down there any longer I would have kissed you again."

But that's what Kageyama wanted. That's why he felt so out of place. He didn't get the kiss he was expecting and wanted. 

"What about now?"

"Don't worry, I can control myself." Tsukishima scoffs, but he doesn't look at him.

Kageyama looks at him instead. "What if I wanted you to kiss me?"

Tsukishima rolls over, blows out the candle that's lighting the room. The smoke of it settles between them like that question; light, but impossible to ignore.    
  
"Then I might just do it again."

"You don't have to ask." Kageyama adverts his gaze and looks towards the ceiling. The embarrassment is starting to come through and he sounds grumpy almost. "I change my mind."

If Tsukishima takes that as an invitation, he doesn't make a move. Kageyama's eyes are slowly adjusting to the low light, and he watches as Tsukishima takes his glasses off and sets them on the bedside table. 

Kageyama likes the way the guard looks without glasses. Younger, more innocent and sweet. Kageyama eases himself closer to Tsukishima. He'll be content if nothing happens he just likes the warmth. And he likes that Tsukishima knows he's awake now unlike when they cuddled on the couch.

"What are you looking at?" Tsukishima mutters. He's whispering as if they're not allowed to speak too loudly.

"I don't know." Kageyama tries to speak quietly too but that has never been his strong suit. "You look cute."

"Shut up." Tsukishima shoots back, but there's no heat to it. He squeezes Kageyama's hand with a small, hidden smile.

"Whatever. Just go to sleep." Kageyama rolls over so he's facing Tsukishima but he doesn't move any closer, their hands are still together. He forces his eyes closed so he can actually try to sleep instead of just staring at Tsukishima.

Their hands untangle only for Tsukishima to pull him closer by the waist. His breath is hot on Kageyama's ear and it sends shivers down his spine.    
  
"You really think I can just go to sleep with you so close to me?"

Kageyama hides his face against Tsukishima's neck. "I thought you said you could control yourself."

"That was before you said you wanted it." Tsukishima laughs, just a rumble in his throat. "Now that's all I can think about."

Kageyama lightly drags his nose along Tsukishima's throat. This honestly wasn't where he thought this night would go but he can't help follow along. 

"What do you plan on doing about it?"

"Whatever you'll let me do."

Kageyama lifts his head enough to look into Tsukishima's eyes. 

"Kiss me."

In a split second, he swears something changes in Tsukishima's eyes, but there's no time to be sure. The blond is pulling the air from his lungs with only his lips on Kageyama's.

It's different this time. This is the only time they've kissed that Kageyama explicitly requested it instead of just following along. Tsukishima's hand is strong on Kageyama's back and he finds his own arms moving around Tsukishima's shoulders.

Tsukishima's t-shirt is soft under his palms, cool as where Kageyama's skin is burning. Their lips make small noises as they kiss, breathy gasps in between. It takes Kageyama way too long for his brain to catch up and realize that he's the one making those sounds.

Tsukishima rolls Kageyama over on his back and hovers over him, probably encouraged by the sounds. The fae's hand slips under his shirt and it pulls another embarrassing noise out of him.

His hands leave Tsukishima's shoulders to slap over his mouth the second Tsukishima starts trailing his lips downward.

"No." Tsukishima uses the hand that's not lightly tracing over his side to grip his hands over his head. Kageyama doesn't want to admit how attractive that is. "I like it."

"I sound stupid." Kageyama blurts out. He can feel his cheeks burning, spreading down his neck to his chest.

"No you don't." Tsukishima nips at his jaw. "You're amazing."

Kageyama's whole body feels light, like he's caught between floating and falling. It doesn't occur to him that the fae's teeth may be leaving marks, or that his traitorous lips let out another gasp. All he can feel is Tsukishima's hand on his wrists, fingers over his ribs, mouth on his throat.

Tsukishima's lips are hitting all his sensitive skin making him shiver. His voice rumbles low in his ear. 

"What else do you want?"

"What else?" Kageyama feels the words leave his lips more than he consciously says them. He didn't think he would be getting this, what else could he even ask for?

" _ Anything _ ." Tsukishima practically whispers. "Is there anything else you wanted me to do?"

"Whatever you want." Kageyama drags in a ragged breath as Tsukishima makes a deep mark over his collarbone. "I don't know what I'm doing, so just...don't stop."

Tsukishima lifts his head, letting his gaze travel over Kageyama's face. Something lingers and he swears it's hesitation but it's quickly gone when Tsukishima captures his lips. There's something softer about this kiss even when it doesn't feel any less heated than before. In fact it feels more intense.

" _ I shouldn't be doing this _ ." Tsukishima mutters in Fae, even as he slips his hand under Kageyama's nightshirt.

Kageyama almost misses it. He's too distracted by his touch to remember he isn't supposed to know what he said.   
  
"Doing what?" At least he's smart enough to reply in Japanese.

"Doing..." The blond trails off, pulling away too suddenly. He looks confused, suspicious. But he must decide that he didn't speak the language he thought he did, because he takes a breath and starts over in Japanese. "I said...that I shouldn't be doing this."

"Why not?" Kageyama leans forward and kisses the corner of his mouth, thanking his luck that Tsukishima let his mistake go. "I thought you said you wanted this."

"You have no idea how much I want to do to you." Tsukishima tangles a hand in Kageyama's dark hair, allowing the human to steal another kiss.

Kageyama loses his breath at the implications of his words. He lifts his hand and traces his fingertips across Tsukishima's cheek, up his cheekbone to the tip of a pointed ear. 

"Then what's wrong?"

Tsukishima closes his eyes at the touch, like he can't help it.    
  
"Just for tonight, can we pretend it's nothing?"

Kageyama doesn't know what he's talking about. He can't think of any reasons why he should be hesitant if he wants this, but he's never been able to figure Tsukishima out. So he just agrees instead of making it worse. 

"Sure."

He's rewarded for his agreement with Tsukishima's lips on his again, the hand on his side smoothing over his chest.

Kageyama's own hands are hanging onto Tsukishima's back, tugging on his shirt. A small whine escapes his mouth that Tsukishima just kisses away. Whatever minor hesitation that was there is gone now, replaced by a sense of urgency that sends Kageyama reeling.

Tsukishima's lips move back down to his throat, most likely trying to fish out more noises from Kageyama. His hands never move past Kageyama's waist but the touch is leaving goosebumps along their paths. Kageyama knows he can get used to this feeling.

He's never kissed anyone before, or at least not like this. There were a few childish pecks on the lips when he was in middle school, and one notable sloppy makeout the summer before high school. But this was something different. He can feel this in his deepest nerves, erasing all thoughts that are not Kei.

It's a bit odd being one the receiving end of so much attention. Not too many people want to stick around him once they learn more about his personality. He even thought Tsukishima was in the same boat but he was clearly wrong about the fae.

" _ Amazing _ ." Tsukishima mutters in Fae between shallow breaths.

"Can you stop-" Kageyama is cut off by a gasp as Tsukishima lightly bites at his neck. Although he does stop and look at Kageyama confused. He shakes his head and continues his sentence. "Stop speaking Fae. It's not fair." It will feel too much like lying if he explains why but Tsukishima would already know the reason.

"Amazing. I said you're amazing." Tsukishima traces his fingers up Kageyama's side. "I'll try to stop."

"How am I amazing? Kageyama squirms at the touch tickling him. "I'm not even doing anything."

"You are so," Tsukishima pinches his hip just to watch him jolt. "Responsive. Are all humans this sensitive?"

"I-I don't know." Kageyama frowns at the teasing. "I've never done anything like this before. H-have you?" 

He knows it's a stupid question right after he asks it. Of course he has. Tsukishima is decades older than him and too handsome to not have had relationships before.

"Not with a human." Is the only reply he gets.

"It's okay." Kageyama catches his breath. "I'm not jealous."

Tsukishima looks like he's going to say something snarky, but thinks better of it. Instead, he presses his lips to the soft spot under Kageyama's ear.   
  
"Good."

"You- _ ah _ ." Kageyama is really bad at complimenting people but he wants to try since Tsukishima seems to like doing it to him. "You feel good too."

"You like this?" There's a smug tone to Tsukishima's voice that makes Kageyama want to punch him, but at the same time it makes him feel hot.

Instead he retaliates. He tangles his fingers in the short blonde hair and gives a small tug. 

"I thought that was obvious."

"Hah," Tsukishima's grin is sharp. "I just want to hear you say it."

"Fine." Kageyama pouts and drops his hand. "I like this."

Tsukishima's hand slips down to press over his thighs, just a tease before he's tracing Kageyama's chest again.

"Do you like this?" Kageyama almost whispers.

"It's more than I let myself imagine."

"You..." Kageyama shivers as Tsukishima's hands lightly trace his sides. "You've thought of this before?"

The guard's breath blows cool over his heated skin, up to his ear. "This, and so much more."

Kageyama almost panics. He never really let himself think past what they were, even after Tsukishima kissed him for the first time. He never knew that Tsukishima wanted him so much, at least physically. Maybe that's just it, maybe Tsukishima just wanted this to be a physical thing. He forces himself to speak just to seem unphased. 

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"You're a human, not yet an adult. It was inappropriate." Tsukishima brushes his lips against Kageyama's jaw. "I just can't help myself with you."

He never really felt their age difference before and his explanation does calm him down a bit. For some reason he feels unsatisfied. He can't place why but he's distracted now. 

"What changed your mind?"

"Like I said," One deft move and they're rolling again, and Tsukishima is smirking up at him. "I can't help myself when you're this close to me."

"Is this all you want?" Kageyama runs his hand down his chest, then shakes his head because that's not what he means. He can't get his words right with Tsukishima distracting him. Does Kageyama himself want more? Does Tsukishima? "Nevermind."

"I don't need anything more than you're giving me right now." Tsukishima's hands are like sparks on his skin, a current across his abdomen. "But what I want...Well, that's entirely different."

Kageyama puts his hands on Tsukishima's wrists and rubs his thumbs into the bones. "What do you want?"

"Everything."

Kageyama wants him to clarify. It's overwhelming that someone thinks so much of him, or about him really. But Kageyama doesn't get the chance to ask for explanations because Tsukishima is kissing him again.

Hands on his chest, lips on his. Too hot, too much, not nearly enough. Kageyama grips Tsukishima's shirt like he might pass out if he lets go. He shifts on the faerie's lap and almost chokes on the realization of just how much Tsukishima seems to be enjoying this.

Tsukishima hums, his hands move down to hold his waist. He tugs him closer, probably just to show off he can still pull him around with that stupid inhuman strength. 

"What are you up to, Tobio?"

He's not really up to anything, but he stammers like he just got caught anyway.    
  
"I don't- I'm not- nothing."

Tsukishima snorts. His smile is teasing, enjoying him being flustered in a new way. "You're always so honest."

"It's only fair." Kageyama mutters, thinking that maybe Tsukishima knows less than he thinks. At least he hopes the fae doesn't know about his secret language lessons. "You can't lie to me, so I shouldn't either."

Tsukishima looks away but his thumbs are still moving lightly along his hip bone. "We've fought enough that you know that's not exactly true. You're the honest one between us."

"Am I?" Kageyama whispers.

"You say what you think." Tsukishima has the faintest of smiles but he still can't look at him. "You stand up to me, even when I'm being cruel. I have never met anyone like you."

Kageyama doesn't know what to say, so he just kisses him again, praying that the feeling in his chest will somehow translate to the blond.

Tsukishima's hands move across his back happily accepting the kiss. The touches feel softer and less rushed so maybe Tsukishima is feeling odd too. It doesn't match the earlier rush or the desperate need for touch. Tsukishima just holds him close and kisses him back.

They go on like that for quite a while. The night outside becomes darker, the moonlight bright enough to reflect off of Tsukishima's eyes. After a while, Tsukishima sits up to hold Kageyama in his lap, Kageyama's legs going around his waist naturally, grateful for the change in position.

Kageyama's arms lay casually over Tsukishima's shoulders and his fingers play in his short hair. When he came in the room he thought he would be asleep by now, just simply sharing the bed. He didn't expect to spend so long kissing either. It's like Tsukishima can't get enough.

And really, he can't either. His lips are sore and he knows they're going to chap the moment he steps outside in the cold air tomorrow, but he can't bring himself to stop. He may never get this moment again.

But he can feel his eyes getting heavy. He wants to keep going but all he's feeling is relaxed and secure in Tsukishima's arms. They're perfect for holding him so close, so careful.

"Getting tired?" Tsukishima murmurs, lips against his throat. Kageyama used to be annoyed by how easily Tsukishima seems to be able to read him. Now it just makes him feel fuzzy.

He shakes his head. He doesn't want to be the one who gives in first. Tsukishima could keep going so he wants to too. 

"I'm fine."

"You're half asleep." Tsukishima says back. He's clearly amused by the upturn of his lips and the lilt to his voice.

Kageyama rests his forehead against Tsukishima's. "But I don't want to stop."

" _ Testing my patience _ ." Tsukishima sighs, once again in Fae, but Kageyama doesn't get the chance to ask what he means. The guard is flipping them again, pinning him to the bed just like before.

"Wha-" Kageyama blinks and aligns himself from the sudden movement. "Are you mad?"

It takes Tsukishima a moment to answer, each second more uncomfortable than the last, until he finally speaks again. "No." His hands come up to cup Kageyama's face, his eyes like molten gold. "But the longer you're in my lap, the more I want to defile you."

"I..." Kageyama blushes but he can't look away from Tsukishima's eyes. "I don't think- I-"

"Yeah, I didn't think so." The weight over him is gone as Tsukishima rolls over to the side.

"What?" Kageyama asks, completely lost. Tsukishima is pulling him in different directions so fast it's hard to keep up.

"Just go to sleep, Tobio."    
  
If Kageyama didn't know any better, he would say Tsukishima sounds embarrassed.

"Oh." Kageyama tries not to feel dismissed. He knows Tsukishima is just trying to control himself so he drops it. He turns on his side so his back is facing Tsukishima. "Good night."

Tsukishima makes some sort of affirming noise, but doesn't move or speak again until he's rolling over to his side with a soft sound.

Kageyama tries to ignore the presence behind him even though it's hard. He can hear the wildlife filtering through the window mixing with Tsukishima's soft breathing. It's more comforting than he would have expected and soon he's able to fully relax.

He pulls the blankets up around his neck. He likes the way they smell. Like vanilla bark and soap, like Tsukishima, like home.

He soon feels Tsukishima's arm rest over his waist quickly followed by the warmth of his body pressed against his. Everything just feels perfect and he lets sleep take over him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima shakes his head like he's trying to clear it. "I can't talk to you right now."
> 
> "What?" Kageyama says intelligently. He thought for sure that Tsukishima was going to start screaming at him. But maybe by now he should know him better than to expect the blond to lose his temper like that.
> 
> Tsukishima keeps slowly backing away from Kageyama, towards the entryway."I need to think."

The morning after that is weird, to say the least. He wakes in Tsukishima's arms, face pressed to the blond's shoulder. For a moment, it's peaceful. But the millisecond he moves, Tsukishima is sitting up and pulling away.

Kageyama doesn't think too much of it. Tsukishima was always the early riser between them. Kageyama stretches his arms over his head, feeling a satisfying crack in his back. He opens his eyes to see Tsukishima sitting on the edge of the bed.   
  
"Good morning."

"Morning." He mumbles back. Just because Tsukishima is an early bird doesn't mean he's pleasant until at least 10 am.

Kageyama would rather not get up especially because the blankets are still warm and smell like Tsukishima. He almost wants to bring up last night but something is holding him back. If Tsukishima wanted to talk about it he would still be in bed. 

"When is your brother coming over?"

"He will be here for lunch." The guard stands up and rolls the stiffness from his neck. "I'm going to have a bath."

"Oh, okay." Tsukishima walks out of the room without another word. Kageyama just lays in bed confused. Tsukishima hasn't been this cold to him since their fighting was at a constant. And with how well last night went, he thought that this behavior would be over. Did Tsukishima even care that happened at all?

He isn't sure what to do about it. So he just doesn't do anything. He leaves the room eventually to find clothes for the day and tame his horrendous bedhead, but he allows Tsukishima to avoid him for the most part.    
  
Around mid-morning he visits with his brother and Iwa-chan, and that puts him in a much better mood. They all go for lunch at a pub-esque style restaurant in town. Iwaizumi is as pleasant as ever, and Oikawa tells them about wedding planning and trying to memorize all the Fae laws to help Ushijima better. Kageyama wants to tell them about Tsukishima, but he's not even sure what he would say. So he doesn't say anything.   
  
He makes the cold walk back home lost in his own mind, grateful for the heat that licks his face as he opens his front door. Familiar voices float to him from the kitchen and make him pause.    
  
" _ I do not see why you are troubled by thi _ s." It's Tsukishima's brother, Akiteru, speaking in lilting Fae.

Kageyama doesn't announce himself. Instead, as quietly as he can, he takes off his jacket and shoes while still listening to the brothers.   
  
" _ Because I shouldn't be acting like this. This shouldn't be happening _ ." He continues in Fae. Kageyama gives a silent thank you to his brother and Akaashi-san for teaching him to at least understand basic conversations.

" _ Says who? Mom? Dad? Why does it matter _ ?"

" _ Them and the King _ ." Kageyama sneaks into the living room and sits next to the wall dividing the rooms. He can hear them better now, especially the frustration in Tsukishima's voice. " _ They're going to be disappointed. And it's my job to protect him, not fall in love with him _ ."

Kageyama's heart drops. What was he talking about? It couldn't be about him. But who else would he be protecting?    
  
" _ It can be both. You can protect the ones you love, Kei _ ."

" _ No, it's different. If I had met him on different terms, of course you would be right. But it's my job, I'm getting paid to guard him. Make sure he didn't escape or gets hurt, not to play house. Not to take advantage of him _ ."

" _ Kei... _ " Akiteru sighs and some glasses clink around. " _ Did something happen? You're on edge about this today _ ."

" _ He slept in my room last night _ ." Tsukishima admits, almost too quietly for Kageyama to hear. " _ He was lonely and...I kissed him a few weeks ago and again a few days ago and well. We kissed a lot last night. I was admitting so many things I wanted to keep inside _ ."

Akiteru is silent for a painfully long moment. " _ You didn't, did you? Get intimate with him _ ?"

" _ No, of course not _ ." Kageyama wishes he could see Tsukishima's reactions to everything. There's frustration in his voice but he can almost hear sadness too. " _ He's not ready for that. But I basically told him I wanted to _ ."

" _ I think he wants you too. Maybe you're meant for each other. Like _ ," Akiteru then uses a word Kageyama doesn't know, but Tsukishima scrambles to interrupt his brother and once again Kageyama wishes he could see his face.

" _ No, don't say that _ ." There's scraping against the floor and then footsteps. Tsukishima must be pacing. " _ Don't put that pressure on this. He's still so young Akiteru. I can't be that for him _ ."

" _ You don't give yourself enough credit. You two have a connection, Kei. You can't tell me that you haven't thought the same thing _ ."

" _ No, I _ ..." Tsukishima sighs. He must be wearing the most grumpy expression. " _ I didn't let myself _ ."

" _ So uptight _ ." Akiteru teases his little brother with that voice that always makes Tsukishima scowl and Kageyama has to bite his lip to keep from laughing. 

" _ This isn't a joke _ ."

" _ You're right _ ." Akiteru says complacently. " _ I just do not think you're thinking about this objectively _ ."

" _ What do you mean _ ?" Tsukishima's voice sounds skeptical.

" _ I mean that if this is your long term placement. You don't have forever to make yourself happy. Tobio-kun doesn't have forever _ ."

" _ He'll have longer. Longer than he would if he stayed in the human world _ ." Tsukishima mumbles. He sounds sad and quiet, like he doesn't want to admit his brother is right. 

Kageyama frowns to himself. It's weird to hear people talk about your mortality.

" _ Longer for you to trail him along. Or longer for you to be together _ ." Kageyama can hear the soft smile in Akiteru's voice, can almost feel the hand he's undoubtedly placed on his little brother's shoulder.

" _ His brother is going to kill me _ ." Tsukishima sighs. It's his way of admitting his brother is right and thanking him at the same time.

Kageyama can't take it anymore and he has to say something. He stands up and goes into the kitchen as if he just came in, and he can't help but feel like a liar.   
  
"I'm home." He announces in Japanese and Akiteru turns to greet him brightly. Kei isn't the only Tsukishima brother that can cover things up, apparently.    
  
"Tobio-kun, welcome back."

It takes the younger brother another second to recover his mask but Kageyama doesn't point it out. Tsukishima sits back down on the stool and nods at his housemate.   
  
"How was your lunch?"

"It was a lot of fun." Kageyama stands in the doorway awkwardly. All he can think about is the way Tsukishima's lips curve down, how they fit so well against his own.

Akiteru looks back and forth between the two, bright smile still there. Kageyama knows he can sense the shift in atmosphere but he still tries to be friendly past it. 

"Do you want to join us?"

"I...should really let you two be. I don't want to interrupt your visit."

"Oh, please." Akiteru waves Kageyama over. "I wanted to see you too."

"You did?" Kageyama whispers. He feels oddly vulnerable, like Akiteru knows things about him that even he doesn't know.

"Of course." Akiteru laughs away the tension. His casual demeanor has always been good to diffuse any conflict between his brother and Kageyama. "I enjoy talking to you."

"Just sit down, Tobio." Tsukishima says with a sharp huff.

Kageyama doesn't appreciate the tone, especially because he can't bring up their conversation. Akiteru glances at him too almost like a warning but he doesn't say anything aloud. So Kageyama keeps quiet and sits down in the stool next to Akiteru and inadvertently as far away from Kei as possible. 

Akiteru strikes up a new conversation like it's as easy as breathing, and Kageyama really is grateful for it. It keeps him from staring at Tsukishima, or from biting his nails. 

He never thought that learning the Fae language would lead to eavesdropping on a love confession. He actually feels guilty that he didn't speak up but it's for the best, right? Tsukishima will act on it and if he doesn't he knows it wasn't worth it to him. And that thought hurts. He isn't sure if he  _ loves _ Tsukishima but he thinks whatever he feels about him is probably very close.

He'll tell him eventually...probably. He can't pretend to be ignorant forever. But watching Tsukishima avoid his eyes lies like an ache on his chest, and he doesn't want to think about what might happen if he calls Tsukishima out on his confession.

He can feel his focus slip from Akiteru's conversation. He can't focus on what the fae is saying. He tries to pay attention and he does reply to some questions but even he can tell Akiteru is noticing the shift. Once he hears a natural lull in the conversation he stands up and gives an apologetic smile, or close to one.   
  
"Sorry, I'm just a bit tired. I'm going to take a nap."

"I'll actually be going home now. It's supposed to snow again tonight." It's so very obviously an excuse, but Akiteru pulls it off so well. He hugs Kageyama, as he has taken to doing recently, and then his brother.   
  
" _ Think about what I said _ ." He tells Kei in their language. " _ I will always be on your side, even if mom and dad are not _ ."

He nods but doesn't say anything more. Akiteru is gone after another quick smile and now they are left in silence. 

Kageyama bites his lip and awkwardly looks to the stairs. "Umm, I'll be in my room if you need me."

Tsukishima shrugs. He looks less tense than before, but now it's just turned into a sort of contemplative apathy.

He should have known Tsukishima wouldn't say anything or even try to stop him. Still, he feels disappointed. So he doesn't say anything more, he just leaves and doesn't look back.

He tries to think, to rationalize. Tsukishima will come back to him eventually. He always does, once he has a moment to collect himself.

But he's worried about how long that would take. Kageyama doesn't know how he'll be able to handle knowing Tsukishima's secret and still have to act like everything is fine. He wants to talk to his brother about it but if Oikawa finds out there's a good chance he'll march right up to Tsukishima and demand Tsukishima tell him the truth. Or he'll just keep poking at it until Tsukishima explodes and that sounds even worse.

With a frustrated sound, he makes a decision and, before he can think it through, he turns around.    
  
"Kei!" He doesn't mean to yell like he does, but he can't seem to keep his voice down.

Tsukishima darts out of the kitchen, eyes wide. "What's wrong?"

Kageyama waits until Tsukishima is in his space, frantically looking over him as if he might be injured. And then he grabs the blond's collar, whispers,    
  
"Don't get mad." And he crashes their lips together.

Tsukishima freezes, his hands quickly landing on the human's hips anyway. He kisses back naturally but seems to catch himself and pulls away, stays close enough that Kageyama could easily kiss him again but he knows not to. "Why would I be mad?"

Kageyama swallows. This is it. He has to tell him.    
  
" _ Because _ ," He stammers in broken, awkward Fae, " _ I didn't...tell you I can...understand _ ."

Tsukishima steps back on instinct but Kageyama can see him working though what he means. Why he's randomly confessing about speaking his language. Kageyama sees the moment Tsukishima puts on his stoney mask with furious revelation. 

" _ How much did you hear _ ?"

"A lot." He admits, switching back to Japanese. His mind is doing too many gymnastics to try and keep speaking the foreign tongue. It was now go big or go...well, he's already home so he guesses he'll just live an awkward existence if this doesn't go in his favor. "I don't know what Akiteru was talking about, but I know that you don't think this can work."

"How long have you been about to understand me?" Tsukishima takes another step back and out of Kageyama's hands. Kageyama already knows this isn't going the way he planned. "Were you spying on me?"

"No!" He fumbles out. "I've been learning some Fae with my brother. I just wanted to be able to talk to people here, and I thought it would be fun to surprise you by having a conversation. But this is not what I planned!"

"But you did spy on us. You heard that whole conversation!" Tsukishima's voice is rising but he isn't moving. This is new for Kageyama. Normally Tsukishima would be smirking it off by now, trying to bait him into overreacting. It feels like Tsukishima is past mad. "That wasn't for you to hear, Tobio! Why didn't you stop us!?"

"I don't know!" This whole thing was crashing down around him faster than he could try to pick up pieces. "It's not like I knew you would be talking about me!"

Tsukishima stays quiet and Kageyama finally sees what the real problem is. 

Tsukishima is shaken. Kageyama has never seen him like this before because he isn't mad; he's confused and embarrassed and probably a little betrayed, too.    
  
Tsukishima shakes his head like he's trying to clear it. "I can't talk to you right now."

"What?" Kageyama says intelligently. He thought for sure that Tsukishima was going to start screaming at him. But maybe by now he should know him better than to expect the blond to lose his temper like that.

Tsukishima keeps slowly backing away from Kageyama, towards the entryway."I need to think."   
  
He doesn't wait for a response. He walks to the front door and Kageyama's chest feels so tight he doesn't know what to do. Tsukishima doesn't look back after throwing on his boots and a jacket much too thin for how cold it is outside. He briefly pauses when he reaches the door but he shakes his head one more time and walks out of the house.

That. Did not go as expected. It wasn't what Kageyama had hoped for, but it wasn't the absolute disaster he was bracing himself for. In fact, this was worse. So much worse, because he has no idea what he's supposed to do now.

Kageyama slowly lowers himself to the floor. He knew there was a chance that Tsukishima would yell at him but he has never walked away from him before. But now it feels like he ruined any chance for them. Tsukishima won't trust him anymore. He's probably on his way to the King to make him switch his job.

He sits there for a long time, not moving much at all. It's getting dark when he hears the front door open and close, and his head jerks up so fast his neck cracks. He ignores the sharp pain as footsteps come down the entry hall. 

What would he say when he saw Tsukishima? Would Tsukishima even want to talk to him? Would he just ignore him? His mind is still scrambling when he catches sight of blond hair turning the corner into the kitchen. But it's not the blond he expected.   
  
"Tobio-kun." Akiteru's voice is soothing, calm. It's so different from Kei it makes tears spring to Kageyama's eyes.

He can't do anything but let them fall. The crashing weight of what happened between them finally settles and Kageyama is so disappointed that it isn't Kei coming back to comfort him. He draws his knees to his chest and hides his face behind his knees.   
  
"I messed up."

Akiteru sits down beside him, folding his absurdly long legs under himself.    
  
" _ I think you're being hard on yourself _ ." Kageyama notices that Akiteru is speaking in Fae. Kei must have told him.

"He won't even talk to me." Kageyama shakes his head, responding in Japanese. He doesn't want to speak fae, he doesn't want the reminder of how he fucked up. "He left me here. He's never left before."

"He's never felt this way before, either." Akiteru responds in Japanese. Kageyama is thankful for Akiteru's observant, kind nature. "He is overwhelmed and a bit betrayed. I can sympathize."

"I didn't mean to betray him or anything." Kageyama rubs his eyes and looks up at Akiteru. "It was supposed to be a surprise. A joke to get back at him since he speaks Fae so much around me. I didn't think this would happen."

Akiteru smiles at him, that same gentle smile he always uses. At least the older Tsukishima doesn't seem angry with him.   
  
"Can I tell you something about Kei?"

Kageyama sniffs loudly and nods.

"Kei has never really had any friends other than Tadashi." Kageyama had sort of figured out that Yamaguchi was his guard's only close friend a while ago, but he lets Akiteru continue. "But he has had more than a few romantic partners. And even through all of them; the initial interest, the drawn out courting, the inevitable fall outs, he never gave a reaction like the one he gave today." Akiteru pauses. "You are special to him. So much so that he's terrified."

Kageyama wipes his tears away and tries to relax his body. "You said something earlier, something that made him freak out. I didn't understand what you said. That we were meant for each other?"

" _ Fhèinleth _ ." The foreign word curls off of Akiteru's tongue like the name of an old friend. "A half self. I think the closest word would be a soulmate."

"Do you really think that?" Kageyama's voice is small. He never really believed in the notion of soulmates and he never would have thought Kei did. "It doesn't feel like we're soulmates."

Akiteru takes another moment to form his words, leans back onto his hands. "It is a bit hard to explain. A  _ Fhèinleth _ is not always a romantic partner. It is simply another person that you connect with on every level, more than anyone else." He looks over at Kageyama and grins. "But I think Kei wanted me to stop talking because he knows that the two of you have that connection."

Kageyama clears his eyes and sits up straighter. He doesn't want to wallow about this anymore. "How long do you think he's loved me? I don't think I've ever considered it myself."

"I think that's the issue." Akiteru actually laughs, bright and way too loud. "He just figured it out himself. That's why he's in such a frenzy."

"Where is he?" Kageyama asks.

"He borrowed my horse, went for a ride to clear his head." The fae sees the look on Kageyama's face and pats his knee. "Do not worry. Kei will come back once he has thought things through."

"And how long is that going to take?" Kageyama can feel tears start to swell in his eyes. "What if he gets hurt? It's dangerous at night."

"Tobio-kun, please don't be concerned. Kei is a combat trained former soldier, after all."

"I think I'm allowed to be worried." Kageyama grumbles as he tries to wipe away his fresh tears as secretly as possible.

Akiteru just nods with quiet understanding. This is what older brothers are supposed to be like, Kageyama thinks.    
  
"I don't know what to say to him." He says after he's wiped his eyes and taken a few deep breaths.

Akiteru slides his hand up and down Kageyama's back in a soothing gesture. Usually Kageyama doesn't like to be touched, but it's entirely welcome right now. It feels good just to know Akiteru cares. 

"It might be best to let him do the talking."

"Kei doesn't like to talk." He argues weakly.

"That's true." Akiteru chuckles with a fond smile. "But he'll still make his point. He'll tell you how he feels, one way or another."

Kageyama chews on his lip. He knows it will be raw and sore later, but for the moment it keeps him calm.    
  
"What was it that you said about your parents? That they won't like it?"

"Ah." Akiteru scratches the back of his head but he doesn't spare Kageyama from the truth. "Our parents hope that he settles down with a nice Fae, mostly so he'll retire from the guard and start a family. And he doesn't want any of it," Akiteru bumps their shoulders together, "for somewhat obvious reasons."

Kageyama wishes he could stop the blush from rising to his cheeks.    
  
"Is it bad to be with a human?" He thinks of his brother and the king. "Ushijima is marrying my brother."

Akiteru seems to be choosing his words wisely, not answering too quickly. It's one of the things Kageyama has noticed fae do when they need to find a way around their inability to lie.

"It is rare. Many Fae do not understand humans or your world and humans only think of us as myths." Akiteru pauses. "For common Fae, it is never even a thought. Some even disagree with the King's choice of a consort but they would never speak out against him."

"They think it's wrong?" The thought makes him sick to his stomach, for more than one reason. His mind brings forward a memory from the night before, of Tsukishima whispering  _ “I shouldn't be doing this.” _

"Not wrong, but unfamiliar." Akiteru ruffles a bit of Kageyama's hair. "I believe it's a shared trait between our people. Fear of the unknown, of being different." Akiteru shifts his legs in a crossed position.   
  
"Decades and centuries ago, before your technology bloomed and we were believed in, the lines of our realms were blurred. Fae could come and go as they pleased and sometimes humans would come along. But as conflict between our lands broke out the previous Ushijima reigns made it impossible for common Fae to travel in your world. We faded into stories and closed our minds off to outsiders. You are your brother are some of the few humans who have made it over since."

"Do people really not like that my brother is marrying the king?"

Akiteru sighs. "Yes, but I'm sure your brother is going to prove them wrong soon enough. I heard he's quite dedicated as well as a charmer."

That is, begrudgingly, the truth. Kageyama has always been just slightly envious of Oikawa's ability to adapt to social situations and charm anyone in the room. Tooru-nii would know how to handle this thing with Kei, Kageyama thinks.    
  
"Probably. I wish I could win people over like he does. Maybe Kei would be okay with it then."

"Kei loves you. Actually, he rather dislikes your brother so I doubt it." Akiteru laughs, making a small joke to try to lighten the mood. "But if you're worried about other people's opinions, Kei doesn't care. He's only worried about our parents but everyone else, he won't bother with."

"Your parents don't like me?" Kageyama doesn't mean to sound so hurt, but he really thought they liked him.

"They like you Tobio-kun. This has nothing to do with your personality or how happy you make Kei." Akiteru places an arm around Kageyama's shoulder for comfort. "They just don't want Kei to be in a serious relationship with a human. But they'll come around, don't worry."

Kageyama frowns at the floor. He wants them to come around now. He wants Kei to come home so that they can work things out. He wants to say he's sorry.

"I'll stay until Kei comes back. But we should get you somewhere more comfortable." Akiteru stands up and offers Kageyama his hand. "Have you eaten recently? We should get food into you."

Kageyama would say he's not hungry, but anyone that remotely knows him knows that is never true. So he nods and allows Akiteru to help him off of the floor.

Akiteru settles him into one of the stools and moves around the kitchen finding ingredients to make snacks. He doesn't talk much more, only humming a tune under his breath. It does make him a bit sad that it's not the right Tsukishima cooking for him.

This blond doesn't hum in the same way Kei does either. It's too light, too brazen. It makes him sad.

Kageyama taps his fingers against the counter, matching Akiteru's tune. "Do you think he'll come home tonight?"

"I hope so." Akiteru invites himself to search in the cabinets for some cups. "I wouldn't want you alone all night."

Kageyama folds his arms and rests his head on top. "I don't want him to be alone all night."

He only looks up again when he hears the clink of a plate next to his head. Akiteru is smiling at him teasingly again.   
  
"Would you rather spend the night with him again?"

"Yes." The easy answer surprises him. 

He still feels the need to be near him and he wants to try to explain himself again. He doesn't want Kei to get too lost in his head. He doesn't care if Kei is still mad at him when he gets home, he wants to see him.

"I know." Akiteru replies gently. "I'm sure he will be back sooner than you think."

Kageyama shrugs and moves his attention to the food Akiteru made for him. It's only a sandwich but Kageyama appreciates Akiteru taking the time out to help him. He doesn't waste any time beginning to eat. 

"Thank you." Akiteru only smiles at him and for some reason it makes his heart feel heavy. "Don't take this the wrong way but.. Why are you here with me instead of Kei?"

"I wanted to make sure you were alright." Akiteru looks a bit sheepish. "I already think of you as a little brother, Tobio-kun."

"You're a lot different than my brother." Kageyama comments with a full mouth. "I'm sure now he would help me but I haven't told him what happened...Kei hates my brother."

"Because Oikawa-san has noticed how Kei acts around you. He teased him about it a bit, and Kei got mad." Akiteru shrugs. "He's the type that holds a grudge."

Kageyama sighs. "Is that why…? I know my brother isn't the easiest to like when you see his real personality, but Kei was trying lately." Kageyama feels his sadness coming back, reminding him of how close he was. "I miss him."

The fae comes around the counter and puts his hand on Kageyama's shoulder. The weight of it is solid and comforting, even if it's not the touch he wants.    
  
"I know. He will be home soon, I just know it."

Kageyama sniffs loudly and shakes his head, trying to seem more fine than he is. He goes back to his sandwich and ignores the tightness in his chest. 

"I hope so."

It doesn't happen quickly. It takes hours for Akiteru to finally be convinced it was okay to excuse himself, and another hour for Kageyama to decide to bathe and change. He's just stepping out of the bath when he hears footsteps on the stairs.

His hair is still dripping water on his nightshirt and he freezes in the doorway. Part of him wants to run to his room and hide but he's been waiting for Kei to come back for so long he can't get himself to move. Kei's footsteps become louder until Kageyama can see him coming towards him down the hallway. The fae freezes in his place when he sees Kageyama.   
  
"Kei?"

"Tobio..." The blond takes a deep breath. "I'm home."

Kageyama takes a tentative step forward. "Are you okay?"

"I don't know yet." Tsukishima steps forward too, looking more hesitant than Kageyama has ever seen him.

Kageyama doesn't move any closer. He doesn't know if he'll spook Tsukishima. "Were you hoping I would be asleep when you got back?"

"Not really." Tsukishima shrugs. He's looking at a point over Kageyama's shoulder, distant. "I just don't know what to say to you."

Kageyama hopes his disappointment isn't clear on his face. It makes him have to look away too. He can't handle this rift between them now. 

"Kei? If I have something to tell you, will you listen?"

"Yeah. I will." Tsukishima makes a left into his room, a silent invitation for Kageyama to follow.

Kageyama follows silently, wanting to wait until they're both in the room. As they walk he doesn't move too far in, still giving Tsukishima his space. He looks around in a nervous habit before talking to the empty air.   
  
"I'm sorry. The reason why I learned Fae was to get back at you for always making comments around me. I didn't mean to listen to your conversation but I didn't stop either." Kageyama pauses to say what has been going through his mind the entire time Kei was away. Everything that Akiteru told him to make him feel better. What Kei needed to hear right now is the truth. "I want to try this. I know we used to fight a lot but now we've become friends and I...I want to kiss you. I want to be happy with you."

"Are you aware of what you're saying?" Tsukishima says, low and cautious in a way he's never been with Kageyama.

"Yes." Kageyama huffs. It's all he's been able to think about while Kei was gone. He just wanted him to be home. "It doesn't have to be a big deal. It can be like dating. We'll figure it out."

Tsukishima looks like he's thinking too hard about it, arms stiff at his sides and mouth set in a frown. 

"You," He starts, a little too slowly. "Want me to court you?"

Kageyama's eyebrows furrow. "No." But the way he says it is more like a question. He isn't too sure what counting entitles. "Let's just hang out but we can kiss, hold hands and stuff." An awkward energy settles over Kageyama. "I'm just saying it doesn't have to be a big deal. We can start slow."

"And stuff." Tsukishima echoes. "Start slow..."

"Um, right." Kageyama doesn't know what else to say. He's never been good with words and the only reason why he's doing well now is because of all the time he had to prepare. He takes a step back to the door. "Just think about it."

He watches Tsukishima's tongue dart out to wet his lips, sees his Adam's apple bob as he swallows.    
  
"I certainly will."

Kageyama backs up until he feels the door handle in his hands. He can't take his eyes off Tsukishima but he knows this is probably the best time to leave. "Good night, Kei."

"Goodnight, Tobio."    
  
He closes the door behind him just as his heart rate catches up to him and he feels lightheaded.

Kageyama takes a deep, shaky breath. He thought that Tsukishima would give him an answer. Maybe even talk to him after he came home. But he doesn't have any more of an answer than when Tsukishima left. At least then he knew that Tsukishima was upset, now he can't tell what he's thinking.

At least he's speaking to him again. Kageyama wasn't sure what his plan would be if Tsukishima just wouldn't talk to him

Kageyama is too tired to think about their relationship anymore. He sighs and walks back to his room, immediately collapses onto his bed. It doesn't even take a minute before sleep takes him and finally eases his mind.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Because if we're going to do this, I have to do it right. I need permission from His Highness to abandon my post."
> 
> His words, "do this," are repeating through his head. It's all he can focus on as he stands up from the bed. 
> 
> "You want to try?"
> 
> "I want to try."

"Tobio." A shove to his shoulder. "Tobio, wake up. It's noon."

Kageyama rolls over showing his back to whoever is trying to wake him up. He doesn't care if it's noon or late in the evening, he doesn't want to wake up. So he ignores warning and curls around his pillow more, trying to go back asleep.

"Don't be difficult." The sudden blast of cold air as his blanket is ripped away makes him yelp. "Get up, your brother and the King are going to be here soon."

"Why?" Kageyama turns over and tries to pull the blanket back from Tsukishima's hands. "Since when were they coming over today?"

"Since I asked them to."

That shakes Kageyama out of his sleepiness. He sits up and actually looks at Tsukishima. His voice is careful and he eyes Tsukishima a bit suspiciously. 

"Why did you do that?"

Tsukishima looks away, and the afternoon light throws a warm hue on his blushing cheeks.    
  
"Because if we're going to do this, I have to do it right. I need permission from His Highness to abandon my post."

His words,  _ "do this," _ are repeating through his head. It's all he can focus on as he stands up from the bed. 

"You want to try?"

"I want to try."

"Okay." Kageyama keeps himself calm despite the way his heart is doing backflips in his throat and walks to his closest. His nerves are already starting to build. He just hopes his brother is happy for him, he knows he doesn't like Kei very much. "I'll start getting ready."

He jumps a little when he feels Tsukishima move behind him and he's suddenly wrapped in his arms. Tsukishima's breath is steady and warm against his neck, chest solid against his back. Maybe it's easier to breathe when Tsukishima isn't staring him down with those intense eyes, and maybe it's easier for Tsukishima too.   
  
"I'm sorry." Tsukishima whispers, and Kageyama thinks he knows what he means.   
  
Sorry for getting mad. Sorry for leaving. Sorry for making his heart hurt.

Kageyama relaxes against his chest, letting all of the tension from the night before leave him. Last night doesn't matter if this is going to work. Tsukishima had a right to be angry, maybe not  _ that _ angry but Kageyama has never been too good at predicting him. 

"It's alright."

Tsukishima holds him for a few moments longer, allowing the silence around them to settle in and comfort them both.   
  
"Come downstairs when you're ready." Tsukishima says quietly. He pulls away almost reluctantly.

"Okay." Kageyama says just as quietly, not wanting to break the moment. 

He glances over his shoulder as Tsukishima walks out of the room. He almost can't believe Tsukishima listened to him, that he is actually going to get this chance. He takes another breath before picking out his clothes for the day. He wants to be formal. He wants to present himself in the best possible way so Tsukishima will still want him and Ushijima will listen to whatever he has to say.

If he's honest, he's more worried about his brother. He isn't sure how Tooru-nii will react, and if Ushijima's mind will change based on that reaction.

He forces the thought down and gets dressed. He can't be stressed about it now, not when there's nothing official yet. If he can be okay with Tooru marrying the king, well then Tooru should be okay with him just dating Kei...he hopes.

Dating Kei. The phrase is so odd to him, yet he repeats it over and over. It's surreal to think about, and nerve wracking at the same time. They already live together. They've already shared a bed, and kissed, and sort of cuddled. It was like they were doing all of this in reverse.

Kageyama doesn't care if they're a less than traditional couple, not as long as it gets them there. He won't know what to do if his brother disapproves but he can't think about that. He gets dressed and ready with a strange sense of determination. He will be there for Kei. He goes downstairs to meet him.

He's glad he chose a more formal outfit. Kei is in his guard uniform, making Kageyama's heart do even more weird things in his chest.

Kageyama walks to him slowly, still leaving space. "Going all out, huh?"

"It's an important occasion." Tsukishima turns to look at him, pauses, licks his lips as his eyes scan him twice over. "You look good. Very good."

Kageyama steps closer and lightly takes Tsukishima's hand. "You do too."

Their eyes meet and for a second Kageyama thinks, hopes, that Tsukishima is going to kiss him. But there is a sharp knock on the door and Tsukishima is moving to answer it.    
  
" _ Your Highness, Oikawa-san _ ." Tsukishima is speaking in Fae, the sound flowing and rich to Kageyama's ears. " _ Please, come in _ ."

" _ Thank you, Tsukishima-kun _ ." Kageyama hears Ushijima's low rumbling voice as they walk into the house. He hears coats coming off and Kageyama feels completely unprepared. He scrambles to make himself look natural but ends up hovering in the threshold of the room, awkwardly waiting.

"Tobio-chan!" His brother sing-songs to him as he pushes past both Tsukishima and the king. "Oh, you look good. What are you so dressed up for?"

Kageyama looks down at his outfit nervously, tugging on the hem of his sleeves. "I think Kei should explain."

Oikawa tosses a look over to Tsukishima, but Ushijima comes forward and touches his fiancè's shoulder before he can make any remarks.    
  
"I told you this would be an important meeting, did I not?" There's a small smile on the King's lips that Kageyama feels embarrassed to look at.

"Aww, you should let me tease him." Oikawa leans closer to Ushijima with a small pout. It's quickly gone and replaced with a grin when Ushijima sighs. "Right, right. Let's get this meeting underway."

Surprisingly, Tsukishima doesn't say anything to Oikawa, or even roll his eyes. He simply motions for them all to move into the living area, where Oikawa makes himself comfortable on the loveseat. He pulls Ushijima down next to him with a cheeky grin, but then he's looking at his little brother and the guard with curiosity.

Tsukishima motions for Kageyama to sit in the chair adjacent to the loveseat while he stands in front of the group.   
  
"I asked you two here today to discuss my position here."

Ushijima nods sagely, "Speak your piece, Tsukishima. The floor is yours."

Tsukishima nods back, only looking at Ushijima. 

"I do not believe that I can objectively work as Tobio's guard, however grateful I am for your trust in the position. A conflict of interest has developed." Tsukishima's eyes flash to Kageyama for a brief moment. He takes a deep breath and brings his attention back to Ushijima. "I would like to court Tobio, although he likes to describe it as dating."

Oikawa makes a noise that one could describe as a screech that borders on a real word, but Ushijima stops it with a solid hand on his knee. The king never looks away from his soldier, and Kageyama wants to sink into the cushions.    
  
"Are you requesting to be relieved of duty?"

"I can not trust myself to make decisions based in practicality due to my feelings for him." Tsukishima focuses back on his king, not even acknowledging Oikawa. "It would be disrespectful to continue this position under these circumstances. So, yes."

Ushijima opens his mouth to speak, but his fiancè interrupts him.   
  
"You can't be practical? What kind of bullshit reason is that?" Ushijima touches his arm, but Oikawa bats him away with a dirty look. "Don't hush me, Wakatoshi." He turns his attention back to Tsukishima. "You can't possibly be asking to have someone else become his guard! If you want to be with him, you need to be willing to protect him. Fuck your objectivity."

"I will not be paid to be in a relationship." Tsukishima growls out, trying to keep calm. Kageyama never expected his brother to react this badly. He pulls on his sleeves and looks away from the situation in front of him. "I will always protect him but I will not exploit my position. I will not exploit the trust of my king."

"Oh my god, it's not an exploitation to protect someone you love!" Oikawa whips his head over to look at the King. "Just tell him it's fine."   
  
"Tooru," Ushijima levels, "Tsukishima is following protocol, please lower your voice."

Oikawa crosses his arms and glares daggers at Tsukishima, leaning back and away from Ushijima. Kageyama watches as Ushijima waves a hand at Tsukishima, who takes another breath to settle himself then continues.   
  
"When you first assigned me this post I hated it. I wanted nothing more than to leave Tobio to his own devices." He speaks over a scoff from Oikawa. "But that has significantly changed. I want to be with him always. I do not know what your decision will be but I hope to continue living here."

The Fae King leans forward, forearms on his knees, folding his hands together in thought.    
  
"You would like to both resign from your post and continue living within it. Tobio-kun still requires a personal guard. Are you telling me that a man such as yourself is amicable with the idea of another guard living here as well? Sharing a space with the one you have come to hold dear?"

Kageyama can see Tsukishima's jaw tighten and that's a clear enough answer to everyone in the room. "No. But I will accept it."

"If that is your choice, I will make arrangements." Ushijima says evenly. "However, I would ask something of you before allowing you to resign."

"Of course, your majesty." Tsukishima is keeping eye contact with Ushijima but Kageyama can tell this is a big sacrifice for him.

"Watch over Tobio-kun, when his guard is not here at night."

Tsukishima doesn't answer at first. Kageyama and Oikawa both stare at the King, but just as quickly as the confused look appears Tsukishima puts the pieces together. 

"Of course. Always."

Ushijima smiles, kind and easy. It's the sort of expression that six months ago Kageyama would not have believed the king to be capable of.    
  
"Permission granted. You will be reassigned shortly."

Tsukishima starts to speak but Oikawa quickly interrupts, easily speaking louder and faster. "So you want to date my brother? I was wondering when you would admit it."

"You knew?" Kageyama blurts out.

Oikawa looks at his brother with a hint of sympathy. "It was obvious you two were going to end up here. Especially after the trip to Kuroo's house."

"What do you mean?" Oikawa almost feels bad about how oblivious Kageyama is.

Oikawa smiles, but this time it's soft. It's only a look he's received recently. "You were calling him by his first name. You kept touching each other. And Tsukishima here got pretty defensive at my teasing. He never denied it."

"Oh." 

Kageyama thinks back to that night, seeing Tsukishima interact with the baby, the way Kuroo teased him, the way he got mad at Oikawa for doing what Kageyama thought was nothing. He had missed much more than he thought in that interaction.

Kageyama turns his attention to Tsukishima. "Is that what you didn't want to tell me? That fight we had the night we got back? It was about you liking me?"

"I didn't want to talk about it then." Tsukishima's expression doesn't change, but his voice is softer.

Kageyama nods. Oikawa must have said something about their relationship that made him angry. And after last night he can understand why he wouldn't talk about it. "Okay."

They hold eye contact for a few seconds, and then Tsukishima is turning back to their guests.    
  
"This relationship is not something my family will approve of, and I needed more than a bit of time to mull it over."

"I understand. We are in similar situations, Tsukishima." Ushijima glances to his side. Oikawa doesn't look like he's ready to fight anymore but he's still glaring at Tsukishima.   
  
"You better treat him right."

"I want to do right by him. So that's why I'm asking you," Tsukishima crouches to one knee, head bowed respectfully. "Oikawa-san, I am seeking your permission, in your father's stead, to court Tobio."

"Woah, the fuck?" Oikawa exclaims. 

Kageyama feels a blush fully take over his face. He was not expecting this when he suggested the dating. But his brother's laugh breaks the immediate tension. 

"You don't have to be so formal about it. But I guess you have my permission. Although it's Tobio's permission you need the most."

"Kei!" Kageyama covers his face with a pillow, thoroughly embarrassed. 

Tsukishima himself is turning pink in the face. His expression is hidden by his position, but Kageyama knows the blond is flushed.    
  
"I am trying to be polite."

"Asking for permission is a bit outdated for humans. And it's usually for marriage." Oikawa is still laughing through everything to the point where even Ushijima is chuckling. Oikawa takes a deep breath and calms down enough to actually sound serious for his next question. "Unless... is this is your way of telling me you're planning on marrying my brother?"

"It's too soon for that." Tsukishima grits out at the same time Kageyama makes an inhuman wheezing sound.    
  
"Being with a human is very untraditional in more than one way, Tsukishima." The king chuckles.

That earns Ushijima a light slap on the arm but it is missed by Tsukishima, who turns his head and smiles at Kageyama. "I am realizing that, your majesty."

Kageyama hugs the pillow if only to hide his face again. He wants to kiss Tsukishima when he looks like that.    
  
"Nontraditional, unique, thrilling." Ushijima adds on, but he's barely talking to Tsukishima. He's just smiling at the pretty brunet at his side.

His brother doesn't even seem phased, more like he's basking in the compliments. He wishes he can be so confident like that because right now Kageyama feels like he's going to implode. He's so embarrassed but happy at the same time. He isn't sure how thrilling he can be but Tsukishima is still looking at him like he's the world and he can barely take it. He's never had this type of attention before.

Ushijima clears his throat. "If that is all you wanted to say, perhaps we could move on to less, ah, formal topics."   
  
"Of course." Tsukishima's face falls back to its neutral state. "Could I get either of you something to drink?"

"Yes, please. Than-" Ushijima is cut off by Oikawa who's giving Tsukishima a teasing look with some challenge in his eyes. 

"What about some of that tea Tobio-chan loves so much?"

It's a test, something small to see just how well Tsukishima pays attention. The blond scoffs on his way to the kitchen.    
  
"He likes his with a bit of pomegranate juice. Could I offer you that flavor as well?"

"Sure." Oikawa looks pleased with himself and leans against Ushijima. "I guess if Tobio-chan likes it, it can't be that bad right." Then his brother looks over and sends him a wink. It makes him flush again but he's happy that he's trusting him on this.

"I can help." Kageyama hops up to follow Tsukishima before his brother can give him another embarrassing look.

Tsukishima has just put the kettle on the stove when he gets to the kitchen. 

Kageyama doesn't know if it's just him or if the air changes around them but it's heavier than normal. Kageyama wants to touch him, but he keeps himself back, still testing these new waters.

"That went well?"

"I guess." Tsukishima glances up at him, but looks away too quickly for Kageyama to get a read on his expression.

"Are you happy?"

Tsukishima's mouth twists in a frown. "I didn't think I would be...replaced." He sighs, slow and steady. "But yes, I am happy that we're being accepted the way we are."

Kageyama takes that as permission to get closer. He puts a hand on Tsukishima's arm and tries a smile. "Well you'll just guard me at night. Or maybe Ushijima will change his mind. I'm not even sure if I need a guard anyway."

"Just don't fall for another guard." It's a gentle prod, like Tsukishima isn't sure if he himself is joking.

Kageyama doesn't laugh but instead he leans closer to Tsukishima. "More like I'll count down until it's just the two of us."

"Just the two of us." Tsukishima's hand comes to rest on Kageyama's waist. "I like that much better."

Kageyama rests his head on Tsukishima's shoulder. He didn't realize how much he's grown used to Tsukishima until he was gone and now he wants that to never happen again. 

"I think I've liked you a lot longer than I thought."

The air is less awkward now, less tense and more like that night they cuddled in front of the fire.    
  
"I think so, too."

Tsukishima's hand tightens around and pulls him closer. Kageyama feels like he can breathe again and it just feels so nice to be able to lean on each other like this. They only break apart when the kettle starts to scream and Tsukishima begins preparing the tea.

"That was nice," Kageyama comments as he watches. "The way you asked my brother. I know you don't care what he thinks, so...thanks, for trying, I guess."

"I care." Tsukishima answers quietly. He doesn't look at Kageyama, still focused on the tea. "I may not like your brother but I know he's important to you. So I care."

It's sweet. Way too sweet and Kageyama is definitely not blushing right now.    
  
"Oh." He mutters, about as eloquent as usual.

"I still think he approves." Tsukishima smiles as he pours the tea.

"Wedding planning is making him soft." Kageyama smiles even as he says it. He knows his brother is simply happier than he's ever been.

Tsukishima hums in agreement as he sets the tea and some snacks on a tray. As soon as he's done he finally gives his attention back to Kageyama and embraces him. It's a bit odd being held so gently by Tsukishima but Kageyama can get used to it. 

"Then I'm glad I caught him at his softest."

Kageyama could get lost in this, but it only lasts as long as a few breaths before Tsukishima is pulling away.   
  
"I should bring our guests their tea."

Kageyama finds himself pouting as Tsukishima walks away. "It's not like they missed us. I'm sure Tooru-nii is keeping the King busy."

"I would rather just serve them so they leave faster."

"Good point." 

Kageyama pushes Tsukishima forward towards their waiting guests. He wasn't entirely wrong about his brother. Oikawa doesn't even bother hiding how he's draped across his fiancé's side. At least Ushijima seems to come to attention at their arrival.

"Thank you." Ushijima says politely as he takes both cups from the tray, holds Oikawa's for him. The brunet does not seem inclined to get off his shoulder. "As far as a daytime guard and escort, I was entertaining the thought of reassigning Ennoshita to watch over Tobio-kun."

Tsukishima nods but Kageyama doesn't feel like it should happen like this. He knows his feelings won't change but it will be strange having another person here.   
  
"Is it really necessary for me to have a guard if I'm at home? I haven't been in danger the entire time I was here, even without Kei's help."

"It was at your request that Tobio-kun be under guard, my love." The king directs it at Oikawa, who pouts a bit.

Oikawa sits up enough to take the cup from his hands and takes a sip. It's most likely for dramatic effect but it still makes Kageyama nervous. Oikawa's eyes shift to Tsukishima and narrow. 

"What do you intend to do if you're not Tobio-chan's guard?"

"Continue my work as before."

"You won't let my brother feel lonely?"

"I'm fine, Tooru-nii." Kageyama speaks up again. "I don't need him around 24 hours a day. I want him to have his own life, too...and just...come home to me."

Oikawa smiles. "Okay, okay. I understand." Ushijima not so subtly rests his hand on Oikawa's knee. "I just want you to be safe and happy."

"I know, but I am. Really."

"What do you want to do, if you don’t have a guard?" Oikawa isn't saying yes quite yet but Kageyama knows he's coming closer to that decision. "I'm sure you'll have more free time."

What would he do? He's thought about getting a job or something, but really he feels too awkward around the people in the kingdom. He's only ever considered being around the people in the castle.   
  
"I don't know." He admits, "I need to learn more about this place before I decide on what I want to do."

"I could provide you a tutor from the castle if you wish." Ushijima takes another sip of tea, looking slightly guilty. "I realize you were not able to finish your schooling either."

"I...guess that's true." Kageyama doesn't want to mention how he was only barely passing. His grades were just high enough to stay on the volleyball team, but nothing more.

Luckily his brother doesn't throw him under the bus either. "I think that's a good idea. I had Akaashi to help me learn more about Shira. We can sprinkle in some high school education too."

"I guess..." Kageyama crosses his arms over his chest. School was the one thing he thought he could get away with here.

"Stop pouting." Oikawa teases. Ushijima rubs his thumb against his knee in an effort to quiet him.   
  
"I understand schooling isn’t always the most thrilling endeavor. However I'm sure I can find you a tutor that is suited to your learning style."

"Fine." Kageyama mutters, just to get them off his back. He liked it better when his brother didn't care about his school work.

Ushijima smiles, not hearing the tone. "Excellent. I'll prepare both of your positions tomorrow."

They entertain their guests for another hour or so, until Oikawa is getting antsy to go sit in on a meeting with the council and insists that they leave early enough for him to change.

Once they see them out Kageyama feels like he can breathe again. It's nerve wracking being alone with Tsukishima again but it's exciting. The air around them is different and he can finally be close to him without feeling guilty.

"That went well." Tsukishima sighs. "Better than I was expecting, at least."

Kageyama takes a step closer to him, eager to touch him again. "What were you expecting?"

"Complete denial." Tsukishima shrugs. He starts making his way up the stairs, but glances over his shoulder as an invitation for Kageyama to follow.

Kageyama gladly takes the invitation. He hurries so that he’s just a step behind him. 

"Looking back, my brother was probably waiting for this. Otherwise he wouldn't have teased you about it."

"Is that so?" Tsukishima chuckles a bit and Kageyama wishes he could see his face.

Kageyama hesitates for a moment. "Do you still not like him?"

"I can't figure him out." The blond reaches the top landing and turns around to wait for him. He doesn't look irritated as Kageyama had feared he would. "I guess I don't like not knowing things."

Kageyama smiles. When he reaches Tsukishima, he lightly threads their fingers together. "I've lived with him my entire life and I'm still trying to figure out what's real and what's fake. I think I've been doing better lately."

"Enough about your brother." Tsukishima says, but not unkindly. He guides Kageyama to his room, where he guides him to sit on the bed. "I would rather talk about you."

"Okay." Kageyama's heartbeat starts to pick up. "What about me?"

Tsukishima sets his glasses on the bedside table. He looks so much softer without them. Even though it's not at all that late, he looks a bit tired, too.

"Are you okay with this? With how this is going to be?"

Kageyama shrugs. "It seems more real now, like a real relationship." Kageyama looks away from Tsukishima but he still smiles to himself. "I'm okay with going back to school, or whatever Ushijima wants me to do. And it might be a good thing if we have some time to ourselves."

Tsukishima sheds the outer jacket of his uniform and hangs it on the corner post of the bed. His eyes seem brighter than Kageyama remembers them, or maybe just happier.   
  
"I will do my best to keep unfavorable opinions away from you."

Kageyama looks up from his hands in time to see Tsukishima unbuttoning his shirt. "What do you mean?"

"My parents aren't going to like this. And I have a feeling that once people in town catch on, you'll be faced with some unkind remarks."

"What about you?" Kageyama wants to reach out but he isn’t sure Tsukishima would enjoy the contact. "You'll probably get the worse of it."

"From my parents, sure." Tsukishima sits on the bed next to him, top half of his shirt unbuttoned. "But the people will not say anything to a member of the guard."

"I'm not worried." Kageyama reaches over and takes Tsukishima's hand. It's a little embarrassing but he likes these soft moments with Tsukishima. "As long as I get to come home to you everyone else can shove it."

The burst of laughter startles Kageyama, but only for a moment until he's smiling too. Tsukishima grins at him. 

"That's what I like about you."

Kageyama looks down at their hands. He still isn't good with talking about stuff like this but he thinks he's getting better. "I like that you still try to protect me, even if it isn’t necessary."

"It's simply my nature." Tsukishima leans in, close enough for Kageyama to feel his breath on his lips. "I always want to protect the people I care for."

Kageyama smiles and basically whispers. " _ I care about you too _ ." Except this time it's in Fae. Kageyama hopes Tsukishima has forgiven him about his eavesdropping but he wants to be able to speak both languages with him.

It takes a moment, but Tsukishima responds in Fae. " _ We can make this work, I believe _ ."

Kageyama hopes his relief doesn't show. He just smiles and closes the distance between them, kissing Tsukishima for the first time since his return.

Tsukishima's lips are warm and they accept him openly. It feels cliche, but Kageyama almost wants to say Tsukishima's kiss feels like coming home. After their fight, he wasn't sure he would get this again.

Tsukishima brings his free hand up and lightly traces around Kageyama's jaw. It feels like Tsukishima may have felt the same way. Maybe Tsukishima was worried that he wouldn't accept him after barging out.

The faerie's tongue flicks against his bottom lip, coaxing him to open up for it.

Kageyama easily accepts and follows Tsukishima's lead. He slowly turns his body so he's facing Tsukishima.

"This was all I wanted to do when I got back." Tsukishima mutters between short breaks for air. His hands skim up and down Kageyama's sides like he can't decide where they belong.

Kageyama breaks the kiss and presses their foreheads together. "Then why didn't you?"

"It wasn't the right time." The blond shifts on the bed and pulls him closer, almost on his lap. "I had to be sure we could find a way to work."

"Are you okay with all this?" Kageyama moves his hands to Tsukishima's shoulders. "You asked me earlier but I never asked you back."

"More than okay." Tsukishima chuckles and the sound brings butterflies to Kageyama's stomach. "I have thought about doing this sort of thing with you for longer than I would like to admit."

Kageyama looks away. "Since before visiting Kuroo-san?"

"Yeah." In a way, it's sort of embarrassing to hear it.

He would ask why he kept quiet but he already knows that answer, even if it is nice Tsukishima is finally admitting things to him. 

"Pretty dumb of me for not noticing, huh? My brother did."

"You're not your brother." He's heard that before, but never with such a tender voice, never as a virtue. Tsukishima brushes their lips together again, brief and between words as if he just can't wait a breath longer. "Remember that night we slept by the fire?"

Kageyama nods but chooses to leave out the part he was only pretending to sleep for most of it. He makes a mental note to stop being as deceitful. 

"Yes."

Tsukishima pushes some dark hair away from Kageyama's eyes. He would have to find someone to cut his hair soon.    
  
"I almost told you my feelings that night."

Kageyama finds himself smiling. "That probably would have been a lot less dramatic than what actually happened."

"I just couldn't bring myself to say it. You were so content, I couldn't risk breaking that." Tsukishima rests his forehead on Kageyama's shoulder, lips brushing his neck and blond hair against his cheek. "And I let it build up until I kissed you for the first time."

Kageyama leans his head against Tsukishima's, oddly a reverse of the night by the fire. "I didn't begin to realize my feelings until you kissed me. So it was probably for the best you didn't say anything."

"So that's when you caught on." Tsukishima smiles, mostly to himself, and kisses his way up Kageyama's neck. "It took all I had not to go further with you."

"I just knew that I wanted to kiss you again." Kageyama adjusts to let Tsukishima be more comfortable. "It was actually the night I came into your bedroom that I figured it out."

Tsukishima actually seems a little surprised by that. "Really? That was what it took?"

Kageyama frowns. "I'm bad at stuff like this, okay." He sighs and squeezes Tsukishima's hand. "I just knew I wanted to be next to you. I didn't really understand why, but I needed to be near you."

The hand on his waist pushes him back just enough for Tsukishima to look him in the eyes, all molten caramel and blond lashes.    
  
"I'm just happy it worked out in the end. I have a lifetime for you to figure things out."

Kageyama has to look away. "It might take a lifetime."

Tsukishima's lips find his again, smooth like it's effortless. Every inch of Kageyama's body feels warm, pricked with the cool of Tsukishima's skin.    
  
"Whatever it takes, Tobio."


End file.
